Trying Not to Worry

My Doctor called me yesterday afternoon. He called to tell me he got the results back regarding the Cholestasis testing, and from what I understand (which may be totally different to what he said), he is going to recommend I be induced at 38 weeks as a prevention. He said my liver was normal, but the bile salt count in my blood was at 11. He said this would be somewhat normal if I had eaten the morning of my bloodtest, but since I had fasted, this number is very high and so therefore, is not good or normal, at all.

He was faxing down his recommendation to the antenatal clinic yesterday, and I go back to see them on Friday. I am 36 weeks and 3 days along, as of today, which means if they induce, we will likely see our little girl the last week of January, beginning week of February. And that's if the dates are even correct.

You might recall a smallish problem we had with that. The Doctor/Midwives didn't know if they should go by the date of my LMP, or by the first ultrasound report. In the beginning they went by the ultrasound report which would have made my due date February 21st. But then, because I was a "week in advance" with everything, they decided that the dates were wrong, and that I was due February 11th.

My Doctor did suggest yesterday that I get retested for the Cholestasis, and the results would come back just in time to decide what we are going to do - at least by my estimations. They need to induce or cesarian by 38 weeks, because apparently after that, the risk of stillbirth increases and so does the risk of sudden fetal death syndrome. Obviously we'd all rather be safe than sorry.

So, I told D last night and he was as supportive and as loving as ever. I rang Mamala yesterday afternoon and told her about it; she said the results didn't feel right to her, so I think she'd like it if I was retested as well. She kept telling me not to worry, not to stress, everything would be fine... Much the same things D has been telling me since last night.

But I can't help it. And I know it's no good to stress over it, because the Midwives may not think it's anything to worry about (they said they'd call me if they did, and so far they haven't) and I am going to see them on Friday and ask a bunch of questions anyway so I'm probably causing myself a whole lot of needless stress right now, which I know isn't good for the baby.

And I know it does no good to worry about it anyway because if the retest comes back saying I do have cholestasis for sure, there still isn't anything I can do about it. All I wanted was a nice, normal pregnancy, without any complications.

I'm not going to wallow in self-pessimism or defeat though. There's nothing wrong with our baby; she's just going to greet us 2 weeks earlier than originally expected. Let's just hope that when I get induced, she decides it's okay to come out and won't get distressed or anything like that, causing me to have an emergency cesarian.