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New Site

2006-05-22T10:04:00.000+10:00

The new site is finally live.

...a lifetime

Please update your bookmarks and/or links.

Comments are missing because I could not transfer them over when I transferred all the posts. Please let me know if anything is awry. No idea how the new site looks in IE, but it looks fab in Firefox.

Much love!

If You're Going to be Late...CALL Me

2006-05-15T11:00:00.000+10:00

So, we had a rep from Pure Water Systems come out on Saturday to show us just how horrible our tap water was. Not that he needed to, we already knew, which was why we never EVER drank it. Well as it turns out, we didn't know just how bad it was.

We ended buying a counter-top water filter that connects into the faucet. We also bought a showerhead filter for our bathroom. Buddy didn't have that in stock, so he said he'd be out today at 10am. It's now 11am. He hasn't even had the decency to call and let me know he was going to be late -- or not come at all.

He said on Saturday he was only repping for this company so that he could better his OWN company. Said he needed to work on his people skills so that when he did board meetings, he would have confidence and not act like a social retard. (My explanation, not his) In my opinion, since he hasn't bothered calling me today, he's failing miserably at his people skills.

The White Witch

2006-05-14T12:34:00.000+10:00

I was talking to mil the other day, and she asked me if I'd seen The Chronicles of Narnia. I said no I hadn't; I'd seen part of the original one before I got bored and turned it off, didn't like it. She then promptly informs me that I remind both her and fil of the Queen.

I watched it last night, and the whole time the White Witch was on scene, I kept remembering what she'd said. After it was over, I sat on the couch for a few minutes digesting the movie, and I wasn't sure if I should be offended...or flattered.

Mother's Day

2006-05-14T07:52:00.000+10:00

Today is my very first Mother's Day. I'm not sure what's being planned for today (if anything), so I thought I would take the time now to do a quick post, and wish ALL our Moms and Moms-to-Be a very happy Mother's Day!

I Am An Over-Reactor

2006-05-12T11:09:00.000+10:00

Seriously. I called Centerlink today, and they're sending me out another form to fill out and mail back to them. Hopefully that will clear this whole thing up.

I think I might possibly try and avoid jumping to conclusions. :\

I'm Sorry But You Owe Us Money

2006-05-10T13:08:00.000+10:00

So I got a letter in the mail the other day, from the ever illustrious Centerlink. For those of you unfamiliar with this division of Australian government, they are basically our "welfare" system. They issue all the dole bludgers their fortnightly pay (which means people who are unemployed get paid by the government to go "look" for work, but who [mostly] really don't and just sit around collecting money) as well as pensions for the elderly, single parent pension etc. I was a dole bludger for awhile after coming back here, and while I did look for work, of course I wasn't going to get hired based on two major factors: 1) I was over 16, and (2) I was pregnant.

Okay, so, I was still allowed to collect while pregnant because even though I wouldn't get employed, I still looked for work and thus still got the not-so-sweet-cash; my constant "looking" for work had to continue until my 32nd week of pregnancy, when I would no longer have to in order to keep getting paid. (I know it's abit confusing, but bear with me)

So now, cut to me being 34 weeks pregnant, and I get a letter in the mail from Centerlink, stating that I did not have to hand in my Claim for Payment form until somewhere in March, instead of the previous date of January something. I called Centerlink and verified this, plus also having verified it with TWO REAL people, face to face, in two separate branches. The lady I spoke with on the phone assured me that this was the case, and that I no longer had to hand in my form every fortnight in order to keep getting paid (which both humans I spoke with face to face, also said).

Okay, now, BOTH humans I physically spoke with told me that after I'd had the baby, I would be eligible for the Family Allowance pension, which is still a fornightly payment but the amount varies, solely dependant upon how much income the family currently has. They BOTH told me that if I no longer wanted to receive ANY type of payments from them, I DID NOT HAVE TO LODGE MY FORM, and my payments would immediately stop.

This was true. This happened. I did not lodge my form in March, because I no longer wanted the fortnightly payments.

Now it is May. I get a letter from them in the mail only a few days ago, and the letter tells me that because I did not lodge my Claim for Payment form in March, that I now owed them $2500 in backpayment from December through until March, and I have until May 31st to pay it back.

WTF?

So now this means I have to call them, and no doubt get the run around before they tell me I will have to make an appointment with my nearest office to go in and speak to yet another person. Should this happen, I might purposely just not feed Kira prior to going in, so not only do they get an insanely angry woman to speak with, they will also get the joys of hearing an insanely angry baby.

Conversationally...

2006-05-08T21:21:00.000+10:00

D: (while looking at the newest photos of Kira) Our Kira is going to grow up to be another Angelina Jolie.

me: Shh.

D: What?

me: I'm writing.

D: Oh, sorry. (pause) I was only trying to be a loving partner.

me: You're still talking.

Let's Play Make Believe

2006-05-08T08:59:00.000+10:00

This will be a fun game, I promise.

First, let's pretend you're me. You're a 30 year old fiancee of a very wonderful and enigmatic man, and you have a three month old daughter. You frequently send out monthly emails to your friends and family updating them of your daughter's progress, because over half of these people don't have access to your blog, and you don't really blog too much about your daughter anyway because you want to keep some things private.

Having said that, you always put in the email how old your daughter is, and when her birthday is. This isn't so people lavish presents upon her (yet), this is so people will KNOW how old she is, and on what date.

With me? Okay.

Now...Let's pretend that yesterday the MiL rings. The conversation is going very well, (which you know is a fairly rare occurance) and you're discussing your daughter; her granddaughter. You talk about her progress and how she's fussing at the moment because at the same time you're on the phone with the MiL, your daughter is squirming and bellowing in your arms because she's overtired from her visit with her Neena and her Nanna, and you're trying to get her off to sleep.

Then your MiL asks how old she is. You take a quick look through one of the many mental folders you have, and recollect that she asked you this question not five days previous when she called. And, not only did she ask you, she also asked her son the very same question. And she was met with the same answer every single time: "She'll be 3 months on May 7th."

So, let's just say all of that happened, and you hand off the phone to your fiance because MiL wants to talk with her son, and you sit down on the couch with the fussing child, and you think for a moment. You know without a doubt that people have been told time and again about the date of your daughters birth. You know with every fibre of your being, if you were to ask any member of your family, when your daughter's birthday was, they would be able to tell you and some of them may even be advanced enough to tell you the exact time, even though that's not what you were getting at.

Okay so we've pretended all of that happened. Now, let's switch places again, and you're a grandmother. Do YOU remember your grandchild's birthday? How should I be feeling?

Baby Einstein

2006-05-04T07:44:00.000+10:00

Under her play-gym, Kira studies the telephone shaped rattle. I CAN touch this!

Rather than attempt the rattle right at the moment, she suddenly becomes quite preoccupied with the star and it's musical lights.

She's learned if she kicks the side of the gym, the music and lights start up again!

Hmm, I like the lights but not so much the noise, Mommy.

This is so much fun!!

Back to the telephone rattle, and some serious consternation.

I Hate the Phone Company

2006-05-03T08:06:00.000+10:00

Our internet is out again. It was gone all day yesterday and I have no idea when it came up, but I was awake at 6am and apparently it was on then. Last week we suffered with the internet being down until around 830am every morning, and then for no reason whatsoever, it went down on Monday until around noon before it came back up. Yesterday, it just didn't come back up.

We called our ISP, only to find out there's nothing wrong on their end (even though they were experiencing a wicked high volume of calls, so much so that my brother was on hold for about 7 minutes), but they submitted a "line problem" ticket with the phone company, who incidentally, were supposed to get back to us yesterday by 4pm. If you guessed they didn't call us back, you'd be quite correct.

Telstra, you can lick my ass. I hate you. Get your act together.

I Again Question the Sanity of One Katie Holmes

2006-05-03T07:01:00.000+10:00

Okay, you all know how I felt about Katie and the Tyrant's whole birthing thing, right? Well what the flock is up with their marriage plans?! And why for the love of god, does she let him control her so much? Case in point:

But it's not just Katie setting the pace. Hubby-to-be Tom Cruise has signed her up to a company called Buff Brides, in preparation for their wedding later this year.

Buff Brides' Sue Fleming told the Daily Mirror: "Katie can and will do it... She has great motivation. She loves her fiance and was proud that Tom oversaw this programme."

She was proud?! I don't understand that! First he tells her what she should be wearing when she's pregnant. THEN he goes and designs her wedding dress without her knowledge or input. THEN he tells her NOT to make noise during the birth of their child and posts signs on his front gate about using hand slow hand motions because obviously his woman is pregnant and therefore stupid. And NOW ... he's enrolled her in this programme because she's got some weight to lose, and she's proud!?

I totally get your man standing behind you, and supporting you through whatever decisions you make in life, but to actually make them for you and then stand by him, is just mind boggling. How is this different from the woman whose husband beats the shit out of her, and then smiles and says she loves him and that's the reason she won't leave him?

This whole Holmes-Cruise "engagement/marriage" thing is just as bad as the folks who get up on Jerry Springer and sing the praises that is their destructive relationship. I just can't wrap my head around it.

It's Kind of Like Judgement Day

2006-05-03T06:34:00.000+10:00

Tornados invaded Australia. I was checking out a map that was on one of those digital boards like they have at NASA, and I saw a small mass of land (slightly bigger than Tasmania) off the east coast of far North Queensland. On this small mass of land was some whirlwind activity, and the projected path for this activity, was straight across the pacific, and right into Australian soil.

I glanced out the window and saw two tornados off in the distance. I started to quietly panic. I don't want tornados, I thought to myself as I got up, and climbed up through a hole in the roof (a man hole, if you will). There, before my eyes, was a delightful twisted knot of tornados, all spinning entwined together, probably 7 or 8 of them in total. And they spun there together, not moving from their solitary spot, all black and dark beige and incredibly menacing.

In the time it took me to spot these tornados, and the new small island off the coast of Northern Queensland, D was struggling with 2 pairs of pants and a key. Apparently he pulled on his jeans, and the key was in the pocket. So he reached into his pocket to grab the key, but then pulled on his track pants to find the same key. Evidently he was getting frustrated at trying to get the key from both pairs of his pants, but at least he didn't have the looming death and destruction hovering over him, entwined lovingly in a mass of wind, dust and debris.

I'm Going Mental Over Avon

2006-05-01T20:41:00.000+10:00

Usually Avon has some kind of stigma attached to it. When people hear you use it, you're almost always greeted with some kind of furtive grin, and a look that implies something along the lines of, That's only because it's cheap, so don't try and sell me on it.

I remember as a kid, I think I may have been around 12 or 13, but not much older than that, and we used to have an Avon rep come around every so often. I used to love pouring through her catalogues and looking at all those mini lipsticks and eyeshadows and thinking how wonderful it must be to have all of that stuff! I didn't realize back then, that those were mostly just samples, and the product you bought was actually much larger. I just remember everything being so pretty and feminine and smelling so lush. But I never really owned any of it, except for the Night Magic Perfumed Body Powder, although back then it was the Night Magic TALCUM powder. And I just loved the way it smelled. It was the only powder I'd use, but I used it quite sparingly as my allowance didn't provide me with enough cash to be able to buy it every month.

And then when I came back from America, I met up with one of my cousins, who is now an Avon rep. I didn't buy too much from her, but I did sop up as many sample items as humanly possible (I now have an extensive collection of perfumes and facial products, half of which I will probably never use). In doing this, I've found a couple of really wonderful fragrances, and skincare products. Which brings me to my entire point: facial products. Specifically, stuff designed for those of us with acne that won't go away, even if we beat it with a stick.

I'd tried everything store bought, and none of it really worked. I even tried Proactiv which did not work either. (While it did not work for me, friends of mine use it and their skin looks absolutely flawless so clearly my genetic makeup was tampered with ... somehow) After perusing through the catalogue of such pretty, pretty things, I decided what the hell, and bought some items.

I have to tell you how much I love the Clearskin Double Action Cleanser. While I still have my blemishes, they are not nearly as horrible as they once looked (I understand all things take time, much as I wish they'd disappear overnight) and not only that, my skin is so much softer and cleaner! Oh, and younger looking. Ontop of that, I also own a facial scrub by Planet Spa (not listed on the website) and another Avon branded mask. After only using each of these once, (on separate days), my skin is again softer, more supple and nourished, and pores? Tightened, firmed and NO LONGER VISIBLE! This shit is truly amazing, and I'm just astounded that my skin looks so much better after only using these products for a week or so now.

So of course, I went on a rampage and decided to buy an assload more stuff, some makeup and perfume and body washes, things of that nature.

So give me that funky little look and that sly little smile when I tell you, YES I BUY AVON - I don't care. I've found a nifty set of products that work for me. I might just start an Avon cheerleading squad.

This is Where I Beg Your Forgiveness

2006-04-30T10:21:00.000+10:00

It looks like my new home isn't as ready as I thought it was going to be, so I'm posting back here for abit. So much has gone on that I haven't blogged about on here, I don't even know where to begin! I suppose I ought to start with a smallish Kira update.

She went for her shots on the 18th, and was such a good girl about it. Infact, she was leaps and bounds better than I was! Her first needle encompassed an assload of diseases, but this didn't make her do very much more than squirm and be audibly fussy. The second shot, however, was the ever so nasty pneumonococcal shot, and christ did she scream. (I'll point out here that I was in tears long before she even GOT her shots) The first thigh had some big bruising around the injection point, but the second thigh didn't, though it did have some minor swelling.

For the following 24 hours she had a minor fever and surprisingly wasn't overly fussy. We had to give her children's panadol (like tylenol) to keep the fever at bay, and just to digress here, why the hell are these meds cherry flavoured? Kids HATE cherry! At least mine does, anyway. So, suffice it to say, she hated the shit and kept spitting it out.

Okay, what else... She's pretty well given up trying to roll over, at least for now. She MUCH prefers sitting upright, which she does amazingly well, and loves to be on her tummy. She can raise herself upright on her hands for a few seconds before coming back down to the floor, and! We have reached yet another milestone: she scootches! Basically this means that it's a crawl but her belly is scraping along the ground. She gets quite alot of speed up in doing this, and very happily scootches around the floor during tummy time. Not always, of course, but alot of the time, and I've found this particular activity wears her out rather quickly so she tends to sleep very well when she goes down for her naps.

She's still fighting sleep during the day, but I'm a mean old mommy and don't give in. Usually I can put her to sleep in less than 20mins of rocking and swaying her, but on her off days, it can take up to an hour and that's when I pull out the Big Guns. Or the pram, whichever is closer.

She's blowing bubbles with her mouth now, and drooling like a machine, so for this reason, we have cloth diapers handy and lots and lots of facewashers to constantly mop it up. That and the spit up, of course.

She watches tv when we let her, and is absolutely riveted to a couple of the shows - the nightly news being one of them. I'm not sure I like that, but she gets a little unbalanced when I switch the channel, so I'm hoping it's just the bright colours she likes. She also enjoys Wheel of Fortune (again bright colours) and a couple of kids shows like MacDonalds Farm and The Fairies. Both of these shows have heaps of bright colours (you almost need to wear shades while watching), and lots of singing and dancing. Truth be told, I like The Fairies, particularly Barnaby Bee. His "Bizzy Buzzy Bee" rock song is awesome.

Anyway. I've taken an assload more pictures which have been uploaded to the Flickr Album, so take a look for some more Kira-Goodness. In the meantime, I need to jet and get my child some food. And in an effort to get you to forgive me for not writing sooner, here is a picture of her and I together (she's almost 3mths here):

Rennovation

2006-04-20T11:54:00.000+10:00

I haven't disappeared off the face of the earth. Turns out having a baby just eats up all of your time, so I haven't been able to get the new blog up and running as quickly as I'd wanted to. It's still being rennovated though, so hopefully it won't be too much longer.

You will have a bit to read to catch up on though, when I finally get it up and running and presentable.

Moving House

2006-04-06T08:03:00.000+10:00

I'll be moving shortly. Not me personally; the blog. I'll be moving the blog to a new home. It's terribly exciting. Stay tuned.

No Creative Title Today

2006-04-02T11:31:00.000+10:00

I was wrong in my last post. Apparently the iPod being given to Katie Holmes isn't songs 'the Tyrant' picked, but 300 of Katie's favourites. Oops, my bad.

Apparently I was also wrong about the whole silent birth thing, too. Perhaps I should do more research instead of just believing all the latest msn gossip?

If you're not up on your "Dianetics," this is what L. Ron Hubbard says about keeping mum while squeezing out a human being: "Maintain silence in the presence of birth to save the sanity of the mother and the child and safeguard the home to which they will go."

I'm sorry... being quiet to save the sanity of the mother?! TO SAVE THE SANITY?! TO SAVE THE SANITY??? Nevermind that keeping quiet will likely cause pieces of your brain to start popping and you'll die of a brain hemorrage; but the upside to that would be not having to worry about saving the sanity.

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In other news, statcounter? Sucks ass. Big, hairy, sweaty troll ass, as a matter of fact. eWebCounter is much much better and there's no restrictions on their free account.

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We watched the Village the other night, and I have to say that was a weird ass movie. I mostly liked it, even though a few choice parts creeped me out to no end (so much so that I was afraid of having nightmares about human-sized echidna wearing red dresses). It had a funky little twist at the end of the movie that tied everything together, none of which I saw coming at all. Overall good movie though.

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Was supposed to take Kira into the doctor to get her first series of shots this week, but since D doesn't start his job until tomorrow, and being that he only gets paid once a month, I can't actually go and get her shots until after he gets paid. Unless our AmEx cards come in the mail, in which case I can because I'll have a means to pay for them. Honestly? I don't want her to have her shots. She's going to cry, with real tears, my heart's going to break and then I'll end up crying.

Katie's unlucky - being a Scientologist means she doesn't have to go through that. Their religion doesn't believe in immunizations. Um... At least from what I've read.

Ryan Reynolds Has a Blog?!

2006-03-30T08:30:00.000+10:00

Apparently Ryan Reynolds has his own blog. I think it's utter codswallop myself. This reminds me of the "Pitt Stop" which was a fake blog from years ago, supposedly from Brad Pitt. Christ it was funny, but of course Brad's army of lawyers decided that they were going to stop the guy from writing "Pitt Stop" because they felt the Bradster was being "slandered" or some such nonsense. So the site was pulled down, and I have never fully recovered.

In other, slightly more serious news, I know I'm not the only one who's desperately praying to Aliens to come save Kaite Holmes from the evil clutches of Tommy "the Tyrant" Cruise. (I just made that up, sounds clever doesn't it?) The latest and greatest is apparently he's just bought her an iPod and put calming music on it, so she has that to listen to as she's silently giving birth. (The Sun Online News Article)

Aside from the initial, "YOU HAVE TO BE JOKING!" cry, I honestly wonder what he's going to do if her voice does raise beyond a whisper, particularly at the crowning. (I'm assuming since she's not allowed to be loud, thus "traumatizing" the baby, she's also not allowed to have an epidural) They don't call it the Ring of Fire for nothing! It hurts like a ... like a ... it hurts alot. And how sweet of Tommy "the Tyrant" to already preload the stylish iPod with music of his choice, for his prisoner, for the birth of ~~their~~ his baby.

So I have a question... Is the baby allowed to cry and make noise? And how is that going to affect poor Katie's nerves? Oh right, right...they'll hire a nanny. Or...cheaper still, they can stock up on Whiskey, just like in the good ol' days - yeeeha!

Even though I probably sound it, I'm not jealous in the slightest that these celebs can hire people to raise their children. I will, however, admit to being INSANELY jealous because these same celebs have maids and servants and people to pick up after them; and I am supremely lazy.

Movies

2006-03-28T17:45:00.000+10:00

We've recently been on a movie-watching kick for the past week and a half. We watched Flight Plan, with Jodie Foster and I have to say it was a really good movie! I was impressed, as I generally don't care for Jodie Foster movies.

D watched The Exorcism of Emily Rose but I didn't, since I thought it was going to be a scary movie. (Ever since being pregnant I can't watch scary movies for some reason) Turns out it wasn't so much, but he really liked it. Makes me want to rent it again and watch it myself.

More recently, as in today, I watched Red Eye which I found to be absolutely hilarious, though I'm sure that wasn't the intention of the people who wrote it. Actually I think it's supposed to be more of a thriller/drama thing, but at the end where she smacks his hand with the hockey bat? Priceless! Nearly wet myself laughing.

Tonight we're supposed to be watching The Village. I've never seen it because it didn't seem like something I'd be particularly interested in, even though I've heard such good things about it. I'm really hoping it doesn't turn out to be like the ulta loser Blair Witch.

Gifts!

2006-03-27T11:42:00.000+10:00

One of my best friends sent me a package last week, and emailed me to tell me to be on the look out for it. She wouldn't tell me what it was, only that it was a surprise, and hoped I loved it.

Well. It came today. And it was a surprise. And I LOVE it!!

Isn't this absolutely beautiful? It's so soft and warm and I just know Kira's going to love it. I can't wait to wrap her up in it; it's a little too warm still at the moment, but the second it gets cold enough, I will have photos.

I love you B, thank you!!!!

In other news, StatCounter is AWESOME. If you're looking for a really good counter, I recommend this one. It logs the hits and keyword searches (which is what I was looking for) and holds them until you purge it. Oh, and it's free. You can't beat free.

Counter Mad

2006-03-23T20:58:00.000+10:00

Anyone recommend a good counter? I'm using sitemeter and I think it mostly blows. I'd like a good counter that also tracks keyword searches - unfortunately blogpatrol doesn't keep the keyword searches longer than a week or so.

Six Week Check Up

2006-03-21T20:12:00.000+10:00

Had our six week checkup today, and Kira is growing like a freaking WEED. I love it!

Weight: 4.8kg / 10lbs 5oz
Head Circumference: 38cm
Length: 62cm

Her overall health is absolutely perfect and we have no concerns whatsoever. Our doctor tells us she's a little bit above average on the chart, which of course we were just thrilled about. He's very happy with her weight gain and her overall health.

We have to go back in a couple of weeks for our first lot of shots, including a rubella shot for me. Trust me when I say I am not happy about having that done. It's going to hurt like a raped ape, and I really don't want to be apart of it though I do suppose it's a necessary evil.

Thank god Mamala will be with me when I'm having it all done though. In all reality, while I abhor needles, my pain won't nearly be as great as Kira's will be, and I know beyond the shadow of a doubt I'm going to be crying because she's crying. And I just know she's going to have big fat tears rolling down her angelic little cheeks which is just going to make it so much worse.

Also, try as we might, we cannot get her to open her eyes for the passport photos we've been trying to get for the past few days. She just will not cooperate on any level. I think she's purposely frustrating us, (possibly thinking I'll show you, my pretties. Nobody makes ME open my eyes just because THEY want it") and I shall tell you why: We walk out of the Kodak place, and her eyes open. She's awake, for all intents and purposes. We walk back to the Kodak place? OH MY GOD SHE'S SLEEPING. Rinse and repeat x3. Now, while you're most likely sitting there thinking, "Oh erica, a 6 week old wouldn't be thinking that!" I'll tell you that you're wrong and because she's spawn of my evil loins, that is precisely what she'd be thinking. Possibly with added swear words. And some plot to assassinate some far distant liege.

Now don't be tough. I know even you couldn't resist this smile and would crumble like the twin towers under its supreme power.

I'm Wondering...

2006-03-20T13:47:00.000+10:00

Why so many celebs look ghostly white in their photos? I keep wondering if the whole neo-goth look is back, and when I find out that it isn't, I feel confused.

So Many Little Things

2006-03-19T09:21:00.000+10:00

If I'd have had Kira in the states, it would have been winter. I would have been able to rug her up in adorable little sweaters and pants and fluffy socks...but most importantly, HATS. I would have been able to put beanies on her teeny little head (that felt like the size of Krypton when it was coming out) and I could have bought said beanie from one of my favourite stores.

Being that I gave birth in ~~sunny~~ ~~warm~~ FREAKING HOT Australia, I couldn't very well layer on clothing and force my demonette to wear a beanie. (At least not yet) Instead, she was forced into wearing singlets and just her nappy, or singlets and a little pair of poofy baby-panties. Or just a nappy. Or one of those "onesie" romper things. And because of this, I got to see her bellybutton every time she moved. I got to see the rate at which her toenails grew. I got to see her little feet (which are 3.5" long at the moment) constantly. And I've never been happier to say I had my daughter in Summer.

But! Winter is coming. Not any time soon (omg, sidenote, the neighbours are cooking bacon and eggs ON THEIR BBQ and it's making my stomach rumble with hunger, and my mouth salivate Homer Simpson style), probably not for a couple of months, but still, it's coming and this means BEANIES! I will finally be able to put beanies on her head. Her Canadian Nanny has sent some to her so far, but her head's gotten much bigger than it was at birth, so none of them fit her now.

Oh, and while she was 52cm (20.5") at birth? She's now 61cm (24") long. At almost 6 weeks old. She's so long, and I can't tell you how much she weighs because at this point, I have no idea. 8.5lbs? 9lbs? No clue. Won't know until Tuesday when we go to our Doctor appointment for our 6 week check-up.

She's trying so hard to roll over now, and gets rather frustrated when she can't do it. She's smiling so much and attempting little giggles and laughs; her eye colour is lightening up as well, and they're starting to get gold through them so I think they'll end up being hazel coloured. Her fingernails have to be cut every couple of days because they're such razor sharp little talons; she was in the beginning stages of getting cradle cap the other day, so we cleared that up instantly with some baby oil and colloidal silver. (I mean instantly, her cradle cap was GONE the following day and hasn't returned)

She's such an amazing baby, I can't even tell you. She's sleeping anywhere from 4 - 7 hours through the night, and stays awake longer and longer through the day. When she's not awake through the day, she's napping on and off, and getting fed every 2.5 - 3 hours. I'll be honest here, and say that when she started waking for a feed only 2.5 hours after I put her to sleep, I was concerned. She had never done that before, and had always slept 4+ hours after her feedings, so this was quite new to me. But, I figured that she knew what she wanted, and she was hungry, so it was food she got. And it kept happening but only through the day. I've since come to the realization that she's going through a growth spurt.

It was, however, suggested that I start giving her cereals fairly soon, but I'm not sure I want to do that while she's so young. It's obviously not unheard of; I was eating farrex cereal when I was around her age (actually, I think we all were) and I know of other parents who have put their babies onto cereal at 6 weeks, even earlier. She's not losing weight or anything, infact I think she's gaining it quite well, so for now I'll keep feeding her every 2.5 - 3 hours and chat with the Doc on Tuesday. I'm pretty sure this is normal.

She's loving her tummy time more and more; yesterday Uncle G flipped her onto her stomach ad she propped herself up on her forearms, head up and eyes bright and alert as she looked around, grinning as she was seeing everything from an entirely new perspective. She had a great time, and managed to keep her head upright for a solid minute before lowering it to the ground and proceeding to suck on the floor quilt. She (apparently) loves sucking on her quilt, her spit/burp/drool rag, her arms, her wrists, her fists and my shoulder.

Also, it should be noted that she absolutely ADORES yanking on Daddy's chest hair. And scratching christ out of his nipples. Feel free to laugh uproariously at that; I do.

I Think I'm a Prude

2006-03-13T13:51:00.000+10:00

...but I'm really not sure. I've always thought I had a rather open mind when it came to sex, however after yesterday, I'm not sure that's entirely the case anymore.

How do you react to someone telling you, that the daycare they send their three year old to, has an abundance of masturbating three year old girls during what's supposed to be their nap time? Apparently they feel safe and secure wrapped up in their little blankies, and just go to town.

The teachers, evidently, don't do anything because what can they say? Apparently they've tried stopping the girls from doing this kind of thing in public, but obviously to no avail.

After picking my mouth up off the floor, I said something about checking for video cameras set up in the room because that just doesn't sound right to me; and yes I know I'm paranoid. I'm also thinking if that were Kira in that daycare, I'd haul her ass out of there faster than you could blink.

It really makes me wonder about the integrity of the daycare center, but it makes me wonder more about the parents of these girls. If it starts in daycare, it's no bloody wonder eight year olds are having sex.

I guess what I'm wondering is, am I taking it way out of context? Am I a prude? Should I be more open minded about these sorts of things? Is this normal?

I'm Dreaming of You

2006-03-10T17:17:00.000+10:00

Josh Holloway of LOST fame. It was a sexual dream. In that he and I had sex. I think it was good, I don't remember. I do remember that he kisses really very well.

So. It's official. I have three celebrity crushes at the moment (but this could change at any point in time).

1. Bruce Willis
2. Ryan Reynolds
3. Josh Holloway

I think I'm also crushing on Dr. House but I'm not positive so I can't include him in my list. I mean, I want to be crushing on him because he's just so off the wall and his sarcasm is unbelievably sexy. But, sometimes he annoys me, so I'm not certain. I think I'm like... 80% crushing on him.

Just thought you should know.

The Definition of Adorable:

2006-03-10T12:06:00.000+10:00

Things That Make You Go, "WTF?!"

2006-03-06T20:17:00.000+10:00

I know there are lots of things that make the average person utter the above phrase, and lord knows I utter it alot (though never around my wee demonette fo' sho') and tonight was no exception. I decided to log into my blogtracker account, and see what keywords we have this week, for attracting termites into the mound. They are thus:

1). giant blinkie dragon (Google)
Okay I can understand this. Everyone wants a giant blinkie dragon and evidently I either supply them, or know where to get them.

2). dermaveen dealership (Google)
Now, considering that DermaVeen (in Australia, anyway) is a moisturizer for sensitive and itchy skin, I cannot imagine why someone would want to know where the nearest dealership is. And would you even consider a moisturizer to have it's own dealership? Warehouse maybe, but dealership? Perhaps I'm just not hip to these things.

3). my contractions are 4mins apart (Google)
Honestly, if you're having contractions that are 4mins apart, WHY are you googling it? Why are you not at the hospital? Or at the very least, why haven't you called THE HOSPITAL? Perhaps even 911? (Or if you're Aussie, 000) Seriously. Google?!

4). menigicoccal vaccination site reaction (MSN)
Okay not sure why this brought up a hit to my site. I'm pretty sure I haven't talked about the menigicoccal vaccination yet, mostly due to the fact that my child hasn't been vaccinated. I can, however, tell you that my child will NOT be getting this particular vaccination, due in large part to the fact that shortly after my sister got it, she developed Ulcerative Colitis, ended up in excruciating pain for almost 2 years while they tried to "cure" her, and on top of that, because of her medications and her special diet, became very anorexic.

4). theraputic gerbil cleansing (Yahoo)
WTF?!

Oh Seven and We'll Watch Them Fall...

2006-03-06T08:16:00.000+10:00

Stole this from SpuddyBuddy:

Seven Things I Want to Do Before I Die:
1. Go to Italy, Ireland and Greece
2. Own my own home
3. Give birth three more times
4. Have enough money (without saving all year) to take all 4 of my children to Disney World
5. Jump Ryan Reynolds
6. Go on a cruise
7. Jump Bruce Willis

Seven Things I Cannot Do:
1. Cook
2. Park a car
3. Intentionally hurt an animal
4. Speak any other language
5. Lose my superstitions
6. Get drunk
7. Apologize easily

Seven Things That Attract Me to Blogging:
1. My own website
2. Being able to write whenever and whatever I want
3. Knowing that my online persona might be completely fake and you would never know it - mwahahah
4. I no longer have to physically (with pen and paper) write all this shit down; I can just type it
5. Knowing the handful of people who come here would totally miss me if I stopped writing
6. Knowing I can post pictures of my child from now until eternity and the handful of people would still return, if only in the hopes of never seeing my child again
7. The hope that I will convince more of my friends (even my demonic twin!) to start blogging once they realize how much fun it actually is

Seven Things I Say Most Often:
1. F* you
2. You know what I would like buy when we get some money?
3. I have to pee
4. I love you
5. Why are you awake? You're supposed to be sleeping
6. Go to sleep
7. Sleep, sleep... Poppies will put you to sleep...

Seven Books I Love:
1. The Langoliers, Stephen King
2. The Heaven Series, Virginia Andrews
3. The Harry Potter Series, JK Rowling
4. Most anything by John Saul
5. Most anything by Dean Koontz
6. The Complete Works of Edgar Allen Poe
7. The Pokey Little Puppy, Little Golden Books

Seven Movies I Watch Over and Over Again:
1. Ten Things I Hate About You
2. The Labyrinth
3. Dirty Rotten Scoundrels
4. Titanic
5. Indiana Jones & the Temple of Doom
6. Dude Where's My Car?
7. Anything with Bruce Willis

Seven People I Want to Join in:
At the risk of being insensitive to the entire handful of people who come here, I'm not going to list anyone's names. But DO fill this out in the comments area for me - if only to give me more comments. I'm a wannabe-comment-whore.

When I Say, "Good News Everyone!" You Have to Think of the Professor from Futurama Saying It

2006-03-05T23:01:00.000+10:00

My knee is almost better. I almost don't look like some schlep moron with a twisted dance-walk thing going on. In related news, my neck is also better and I don't want to scream in agony when I turn to the right. Also, the lower right side of my back is now in cahoots with the lower left side of my back, and each side will have a spasm party at will.

The comfrey has settled all four parts of my wounded body rather well. Except for the random back spasm partying, that is. I can't explain to you how annoying it is to be in the midst of washing up the dishes (because I can't be ratted filling the dishwasher, I'm that lazy) when all of a sudden the lower left side of your back dives head first into a skewering painful spasm causing you to cringe into the left side of your body, hoping that it will alleviate the sudden onslaught of pain. Of course, in doing this, the lower right side of your back decides it is also going to jump on the spasm bandwagon, because god forbid it feels left out. So there you are, doing this funky cringe-hunched-over kind of motion, alternating between swaying from side to side and trying to do a full body wave in order to escape the pain somehow, in full view of the street because you have the garage door fully open, and the garage opens onto the kitchen which is where you currently are, attempting to wash the dishes in the sink because you're too damn lazy to load the dishwasher.

In non-related news, god bless the makers of those vibrating bouncer dealies that the kids seem to love. When we can't settle the wee lass, we chuck her in that thing, turn it on and she settles almost instantly. It must be the violent vibrations that cause her gums to chatter together, that she likes. I can't wait until she finds her voice and will sit there and hum to the vibration so it sounds funny.

Getting back to my dishwasher for a moment, D loaded it up tonight. A full load. On the tough-grime cycle. That has no bearing on what I'm about to say though, I just thought I'd tell you what cycle we usually have our dishwasher set on. Anyway, our dishwasher scares me. I say this because it happily begins its routine, gurgling and wooshing away, until it gets to the pause cycle. I'm not really sure why there is a pause cycle, but there is, and it pauses for a good 5-10 minutes. It's at this point that I realize the dishwasher is no longer loudly humming to itself, and I wander over to see if it's done. Of course, I should point out that it takes me about 5-10 minutes to realize that it's stopped making noise. So, off I toddle, over to the stainless steel contraption, and look at the dial. It's about that time that the dishwasher, as though sensing my presence, inwardly and very vocally belches and then does what I can only describe as a very loud but satisfying sigh, before the water rushes in and it continues through the rest of the dishwashing cycle. This always, always scares the everliving shit out of me. You would think that having lived here for six months, that I would be used to it, but I'm not. And each time that first belch happens, my body involuntarily convulses and my mouth involuntarily spasms into some funky shape that I cannot describe. The moral of this story? It's good to face your fears, and I fear the dishwasher.

Also, if you haven't seen Waiting... then you really should. I laughed my ass off during it, but it contains an assload of swearing so if that's not your bag baby, then I suggest not watching it. Also? I think I'm mildly in love with Ryan Reynolds...who was once engaged to Alanis Morisette?! I guess "You Oughta Know" wasn't written about him.

Walking Wounded

2006-03-03T16:28:00.000+10:00

Let me tell you an amusing little incident that rendered me somewhat crippled last night. I say somewhat because I'm not wheelchair or bed bound, but oh lordy...

So, I shall pre-empt this by telling you we have 3 new additions to our family. These new additions are small and green and hop. Yes, we have 3 baby green frogs in our back yard (and evidently the garage as well).

Last night I was in the garage, and on my way back in. Kira was awake and hungry, and D was busy getting her bottle ready for her, when he and I almost collided as I entered the kitchen. He looks down, points between my feet and proclaims, "Ohhh!" which caused me to leap into the air (literally, yes I leapt like 2 feet) only to come crashing down on the hard, white tile. I landed on my feet, though as my feet touched the ground, something skewed with my left leg, and I jarred my knee, which sent pain skewering up to my hip the lower left side of my back.

Now. What was I jumping in hysteria from? Normally when things are pointed out around our house, they usually have 8 legs, are pretty big and quite hairy. This time? Four legs, green and terribly frightened. Yes, yes, I LEAPT two feet in the air over our little froglet. Thank christ I didn't squish him.

It's funny now. It was funny last night. I alternated between wanting to laugh and holding back tears of insurmountable pain. My entire body shook for about five minutes straight before I could even think about putting weight on that leg. Have you ever jarred your knee? It's really not very comfortable.

I thought by going to bed and relaxing that my knee may be better by today. Not so. In fact, through the night I kept waking up to the twinges of pain as I moved around. When Kira woke up for her early morning feed, I swung my legs out of bed, knee all a-twinge, spontaneously burst into tears (quiet sobs mind, so I didn't wake D) and fetched her from her bassinette to bring her into bed with me. It took almost a full minute for me to get her to my bed, and I was so sure my knee was going to give out and I would drop her, or fall on her. Obviously (and thankfully) I didn't.

Oh, and I also have a neck injury, it seems, on the right side of my neck. Pulled muscle? I'm not sure. All I know is that it's painful to turn my head to the right.

Mamala came up for a visit today with my sister and her boyfriend, and she brought with her a small jar of comfrey cream. She informed me over the phone this morning after I rang her to see if she had anything that would take swelling down (I don't have any deep heat, or lavender oil, or vinegar...) and she promised she'd bring up the comfrey when she came. And she made good on her promise.

Five minutes after walking through my door, she had the comfrey cream out and was applying it to my knee, and then to my neck. Within ten minutes of that, my knee felt worlds better and I was able to put pressure on it where I couldn't before. Not alot mind you, but at least now I don't have to walk with the left leg completely straight. At least I can bend it somewhat when I walk. And my neck doesn't twinge near as much either.

I still don't trust myself to hold Kira or walk around with her yet, not until the knee gets much better than what it's doing right now. Hopefully with the continual use of the comfrey cream, it'll be better in a few short days.

Wish me luck!

Addendum

2006-03-01T10:34:00.000+10:00

I'm a little bit of a moron. A couple of planets shy of a universe. Yesterday when I was ranting about my experience at the health clinic, I completely forgot to talk about the whole pacifier/nipple-confusion thing that I had originally intended to talk about, thus the title of yesterdays post.

Quadruple Sigh.

I was using the wrong bottles, apparently. Well... okay, not necessarily the wrong bottle, but the wrong teat. I was using Avent bottles'n teats, when I should have been using the Pidgeon Peristaltic Nipple. This is to help remove nipple confusion, as this nipple actually mimics a real nipple. It's all very exciting in the world of silicone these days. So I rushed out and bought one. And Kira appears to like it better than the previous ones she'd been used to.

Also, I was told the dummy (pacifier) I was using, was the wrong one. I was using the Nuk Soother which apparently isn't the right one to be using. I should have been using the Cherry Soft Touch Pacifier made by Heinz. Okay, I'm an easygoing girl, so off I toddle down to the store to purchase this new and improved and amazing dummy.

Kira hates it.

Apparently this new and improved and amazing dummy, doesn't lead to nipple confusion like the rest do. I find this really hard to believe, because the dummy itself is almost shaped like a nipple, and when she sucks on it, she gets most upset that nothing is coming out, spits it and starts wailing up a storm. We give her back the dummy she'd been using, and she's happy as a clam. She knows that one doesn't produce anything, and is only there to provide comfort. She knows that one goes into her mouth when she's fussing, or when she's trying to fall asleep. She accepts it happily and will usually fall asleep with it before spitting it out (she really hates dummies in general).

So anyway, that was all supposed to have been put in yesterdays post, but rather than editing it, I felt the need to post it under a completely separate title. No doubt in a few months when I come back to search for this information, I'm going to wish I put it altogether in one post, but I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.

In other news, Mum left us yesterday and headed home. Her two weeks with us were up, and she proclaimed we were doing a "wonderful job", jumped in the car and sped off, leaving only specks of dust in her wake. (Not true really, we don't have a dusty driveway) I cried when she left (freaking hormones!!) and then when I was trying to get a burp out of my wee life-like doll, I wandered into the room Mum had been sleeping in, and thus began crying again. (Hormonal party, all welcome) Uppers anyone?

Oh, and she turned three weeks old yesterday. Wow. Three weeks old! If I'm so amazed now that it's been three weeks already, what am I going to be like when it's been three years?

The Great Debate

2006-02-28T10:35:00.000+10:00

We had our first visit to the community health center yesterday, and not only did I get a new midwife to speak with (Janet), I also got to visit with the lactation consultant, Barbara. But, before I get to all the advice Barbara gave me, I'll quickly recap our time with Janet.

I'll start off by saying that I think I like Janet. She seemed very personable, very nice and was a real sweetheart to Kira; who, by the way, has shot up to 8lbs 2oz (or 3.750kg) and apparently is .50grams above the weight she should be at. (Nothing like attempting to make me feel like my baby is fat) Even though Janet said her weight gain was "good", she didn't fail to point out that she is, infact, a little higher than what she should be. Considering Kira had lost 10% of her birth weight (which Janet said was normal), I think her weight gain is absolutely astounding.

She's also 3cm longer, making her 55cm long now, and her head circumference is up to 36.5cm, instead of the 34cm it was at birth. Her reflexes are perfect, hydration is perfect; in short, everything about her growth spurts has been perfect, except of course, that pesky little half kilo that has put her "over" weight. Don't think for a minute I'm going to stress over that, or anything of that nature because I'm not, but it really did annoy me that Janet inferred my child could gain too quickly if I'm not careful.

And what brought me to that conclusion, was that after I told her I was breastfeeding but supplimenting with formula, and how often, Janet promptly exclaimed that it was all "garbage" and I should speak with Barbara. You can well imagine how that left a little sour taste in my mouth regarding her. So, while I really liked how she took care of Kira, I didn't like so much how she made me feel periodically through the conversations.

Now, onto Barbara. Let me just say I loved this woman. She was so wonderful and actually showed me the RIGHT way to get my demonette latched correctly. I did it successfully twice on each breast yesterday before I left her office so of course I was all overjoyed and enraptured and all the rest of it. I thought, Finally, I can breastfeed exclusively!

(Also, you have to love a lactation consultant who advocates beer as a means of increasing lactation; now if I only liked Guiness, all would be super)

Well we got home yesterday afternoon, and do you think I could get her to latch right? Sigh. Double Sigh. No, I could not. I got her on twice last night properly, but then delatched her thinking I'd done it wrong!! Triple Sigh. Of course I couldn't get her back on properly after that, no matter how hard I tried. It was really very frustrating, and then of course, the same thing has happened today.

But! At least now I know how to do it, and I just need to keep working on it and perservering. Barbara did tell me that I should try and breastfeed through the day all the time, and IF I need to, give her the formula of a late afternoon/evening. She also said that if a supp bottle is needed during the day, only give her 40-60mls so she's not completely full, so she doesn't sleep as long, thus giving me more opportunities to breastfeed and get the milkflow coming to where it needs to be.

Apparently that's the problem as well as having never been shown how to get her to latch properly. The milk is there, but it's not flowing quickly and I'm not producing as much as I should be, because Kira had always been improperly latched, thereby causing the breasts to not drain properly. Who knew? So, my "homework" is to get the latching thing down pat.

Though BIG KUDOS to me for doing it right last night (even though the latch was not as strong as it could have been), after I'd fed her, she slept for three solid hours! WITHOUT FORMULA!!! You can't imagine how jubliant I was.

It really is frustrating though, to know I could get her latched properly yesterday so she was feeding really really well, and today I can't do it to save my life. I'm trying not to stress about it (apparently that hinders milk supply) but I'm so utterly frustrated that whatever I try isn't working. I remember exactly how to do it - it's just getting it right. I'm plodding on with it though, slowly but surely. I'll get there...eventually.

It Smells Like a Hippie Shop in Here

2006-02-24T13:52:00.000+10:00

On the advice of my acupuncturist/homeopath, I have purchased some herbs which are now boiling on my stove. These are to help clean out my insides (from my uterus expanding - I'm not explaining that), increase lactation and provide me with renewed energy, among other things. I get to drink a cup of the herbal water every day for 8 days.

It smells weird. Not a bad weird, just weird. Sort of flowery, nutty and dirty all combined. My acupuncturist said "It doesn't taste beautiful" and followed it with a laugh. I may have laughed along with him, but I don't remember even though I only got them yesterday. To be honest, the mixture looks rather intimidating and I'm not sure I want to drink it.

I'm having flashbacks to being a kid and Mamala giving me nastyass medicines to take. It does seem to be true: If it tastes like shit, it works. Here's to hoping!

Oh and the little munchkin's thrush is clearing up beautifully. I cannot wait until she's off the Nilstat so she starts sleeping better and not fussing or being upset nearly as much.

So Lazy. So Very, Very Lazy.

2006-02-22T16:35:00.000+10:00

I painted my nails about 2 weeks ago. D loves when I paint my nails because it's so "girlie" and he just loves "girlie" things on girls. (Makes sense) It has since peeled and chipped but I didn't have any nail polish remover with which to remove it and then repaint it.

A few days ago, I purchased some nail polish remover. It leaked in the car, so the car smelled rather nasty for all of three seconds before the windows were down and it was being aired out. We got home and I realized I didn't have any cotton wool balls.

I sighed the sigh of one heavy with annoyance.

"What's wrong, sweet child of mine?" Mamala asks. (Of course I am completely exaggerating how the question was actually asked, but I like this question better than the boring old, What's wrong?)

"I didn't buy any cotton wool balls!" I sigh.

The following day, D decides to head to the grocery store to pick up some necessities, not the least of which is corn chips and salsa. Oh and ground beef for tacos that night.

"You need anything from the store babes?" he asks.

"No I'm good." Pause. Longer pause. "OH WAIT! YES! I need cotton wool balls."

He heads out, I take a nap with the munchkin because the last few days she's been fussy due to the damned Nilstat we've had to give her. He comes home, WITH the cotton balls, among all the other things he purchased.

So now... Do you think I've removed the chipped and peeled nail polish from my nails? No. No I have not. And why? Because I'm lazy. So very, very lazy.

Also, Mamala and I went op-shopping today and I bought many books. I now have enough reading material to last me about 2 weeks.

2 Weeks Old Today

2006-02-21T11:33:00.000+10:00

I can't believe my little munchkin is 2 weeks old today. It seems like the time has flown by, and she has grown so much. She's so much more alert now, always looking at the world around her, absorbing everything she possibly can. She recognises voices and looks in the direction of whoever is speaking, and she loves looking at faces. I can't wait until I see recognition in her eyes when she looks at me.

I got my first real lot of smiles/grins from her on the 18th when we were in the parents' suite at the local Mall. We were sitting down, and Mum and I were chatting with another lady who was feeding her son, and I was lightly running my fingernails alongside Kira's jaw, and under her chin and along her cheek, and she gave me the biggest, widest, gummiest grins ever. They were the most beautiful smiles in the world and I could not stop giggling with the overwhelming happiness it brought me. Also got her to smile again yesterday for me; I leaned in close to her face so she could see me without going cross-eyed, said something to her (though I have no idea what it was) and that elicited another big smile. I swear it makes my heart melt.

She loves her baths, doesn't mind having her hair washed, loves getting powdered down and absolutely adores sleeping with Mommy and Daddy. She sleeps mostly through the night, between 4-5 hours at a clip, and settles down quite nicely and fairly quickly after her feeds.

She lays awake in her bassinette just watching the shadows on the wall and ceiling, cooing softly to herself and making little "aaah" noises. She'll lay like that for a good half an hour before squawking like an eagle, smacking her lips and/or sucking on her hands and fingers to let us know she's hungry.

Not that it's been a completely easy road to travel down. She got her first bout (and hopefully only) of mouth thrush the other day and I've had to give her Nilstat to get rid of it. Unfortunately it seems a side effect of the medication is an upset stomache, which makes her squirm uncontrollably and cry alot, and not sleep as well. She's been fussier today and not sleeping hardly at all since 7am, which has made her overtired.

My whole world revolves around this little person, making sure she's warm and comfortable, happy and completely sated. We cannot imagine our lives without her now, and I often wonder what it was that made me smile, that made me happy, that made my heart swell and melt with so much love. I feel strangely empty when she's not in my arms, and my stomache lurches whenever I hear another baby cry and she's not with me. I'm constantly aware of her sounds, her movements, her breathing patterns; teaching her, learning from her, loving her.

Mamala has been with me since the 14th, and will be here for another week or so yet, and she has been of enormous help. I have no idea what I would have done without her help and guidance - she has certainly been more help than the midwives who, rather than offer advice or support or anything "outside the norm", tell me that everything's normal and that I should just "go with the flow".

Happy 2 week birthday, Kira my love. I'm so sorry you're going through this nasty thrush thing and have to suffer through the even nastier medicine. I promise you it will be over soon and you'll be all better.

Home, Safe and Sound

2006-02-16T18:35:00.000+10:00

Well we're home now, having gotten here on Valentine's Day (Happy Belated Birthday Mamala) with Mamala in tow. We've been alot less stressed over Kira's eating habits, and I think I may finally be getting the hang of this breastfeeding thing. We have a community clinic nearby which I need to make an appointment with tomorrow, to go have her weighed and checked, and with some luck I'll find a lactation consultant up there as well.

Yesterday we spent the day cleaning and washing, or rather I should say Mamala did most of it (D sat on his computer and played for most of the day) while I tended to Kira who fussed on and off, and experimented with the amount of feeds she had with the breast vs the bottle and the amount of sleep between.

She's loving her baths, though I don't think she fully realizes what they are just yet. She knows it's water and she gets submerged in it, and then it's washed all over her, but she doesn't quite know what to do with the whole situation. She does love it though and kicks her legs a little bit as she stares at me with giant quizzical eyes. She loves getting out of the bath (er...sink) and being dried off, and so far she hasn't protested too much about getting her hair washed. Someday she's going to pay someone money to wash her hair for her, and wish she was able to relax and enjoy it more as a child, I just know it.

She's gurgling alot more now, and making little noises in her sleep and while she's resting in my arms; her eyes flutter open more and more now no matter what she's doing (including trying to sleep), and it seems like she's trying to drink in the entire world around her; almost like she doesn't want to miss a thing. She's so inquisitive, and while she's awake, she has to look at everyone around her who she can hear talking, or at least look in their general direction. Oh and her sneezes are just so adorable. The first time she sneezed, she looked at me like What the hell did I just do? It was unbelievable.

Mamala has been such a big help to me since she's been here. She's only going to be here for 2 weeks before she goes home and I just know I'm going to miss her so much. By then D will be back at work and I will truly be on my own with my small human and I feel like I'm not going to know what to do!

Anyway. New pictures are up, so enjoy!

Exhausted But Happy

2006-02-13T18:13:00.000+10:00

My god what an exhausting few days! I was let home on the early dismissal program for new moms, which is where the hospital lets you go home on the basis of having the travelling midwives come to your house to check up on you and bub for the first few days of life.

The doctors did a quick check of my baby girl on the 9th, announced she was fit and healthy and (literally) shoved me out the door. I should mention that our hospital is relatively small, and the maternity ward only has four birthing suites which were all full and there were moms-to-be coming in all day and waiting for rooms so they were pushing people out as quickly as possible to make room for the new people. So, off I shoved.

It was not all peaches and cream. Infact, it wasn't peaches and cream while I was AT the hospital. Kira kept me up through the whole night on the 8th, crying and screaming bloody murder. She wasn't gassy, wasn't constipated and I kept thinking she could not possibly be hungry because I had fed her only moments before. I would attempt to feed her again and she'd latch onto my boob with no problem, suck for ages, drop off and then repeat the process all over again.

Finally around 3am one of the midwives came in to attempt to calm her down, thinking she was gassy, and gave her a nice hot bath. She then asked if I'd slept with her, which at that point I hadn't, so after her bath, she was put down next to me, and we began breastfeeding again. I fell asleep, she fell asleep, but periodically through the night she would continue to drink. When we got up the next morning, the process started all over again.

I cannot tell you how frustrated I was. After all of that feeding, she STILL seemed to be ravenous. I was scared that they wouldn't let her come home with me because I couldn't settle or calm her down. Turns out because of the whole lack of beds thing, they didn't really give a shit, didn't weigh her and I was allowed to be let go.

That night, the same thing happened again. I spent the majority of the day feeding her when she was crying, following the advice of the midwives who told me to "demand feed" and let her drop off when she was done. They then told me to make sure I got plenty of rest inbetween feedings. Therein lay the problem. Shortly after her feed, and I'd put her down, she'd wake up screaming again, starving. I did not have a clue what to do except feed her consistently, nevermind that my nipples were rapidly becoming extremely sore and tender, and starting to bleed a little bit.

Friday was the first day the midwife came out to see us. She took down loads of information, weighed Kira and promptly told me that my daughter had lost 10% of her bodyweight. She then told me this was normal, and that babies will regain that in their first two weeks; I shouldn't worry. So, even though I WAS worried, I told her that yes, okay, I would not worry. She then proceeded to tell me that Kira should have at LEAST six soaking wet diapers per day, and at least one bowel movement per day. She had not been having that since leaving the hospital, and on the day OF leaving the hospital, she had yet to have a bowel movement.

Saturday morning came, and I was at my wits end. I felt like I was completely out of control, completely out of my league and unable to care for my baby properly, in that I could not get her to stop screaming for food, no matter how often I fed her.

Six am that morning and I was sitting out in the loungeroom, nursing her again, and trying not to fall asleep. An hour later, Mamala got out of bed and asked how everything was going - I started telling her about all my concerns and wondered if maybe we should get a breast pump to actually SEE how much milk I was producing. She agreed that would be a good idea, and when D got up and joined the conversation, he just asked if we should go out and buy her some formula because it was during this conversation that I came to the conclusion that I did not have enough milk, or that it was highly lacking in quality. I had literally been starving my child, all on the advice of the midwives and all of this being "normal" for a demand-fed baby.

Around eight am, she started pushing my boobs away because there was nothing in them, and there hadn't been anything in them all morning, so Mamala raced down to the pharmacy, picked up some formula and a pump, raced home and we finally fed my baby girl. Instantly, as soon as she was done with her 2oz bottle, she was asleep and as limp as a wet noodle, when previously she had been all knotted up and a screaming mess. I almost burst into tears when the realization hit that I had truly been starving my baby.

But, she slept SO well. Four hours straight, and awake again for another feed. I attempted the boob again and she sucked for a little bit, gaining nothing after an hour on both, and afterward we gave her yet another bottle. She dropped into sleep again, and again for another four hours.

The new midwife came out that day, a woman none of us liked upon seeing her for the first time, and basically told me that if Kira didn't start putting on weight (even after I had explained the entire story, minus the formula) that she'd have to send me off to the womens health clinic to find out the problem. Like that threat wasn't scary enough, she then had the nerve to tell me that all of those feedings, all of those upset nights were normal for babies, and oh by the way, is she urinating and passing bowel motions?

Well, yes bitch, she is NOW thankyouverymuch.

Now we've been alternating the bottle and the breast, and I'm still expressing to see how much milk I actually have. They told me it takes roughly 15mins on each side for bubs to be full and for the breast to be drained, however they had no idea how MUCH milk bub was actually getting. After a half an hour of me expressing from both sides, she had 20mls in the bottle. Hardly enough for a decent feed.

The weekend was fairly routine with the formula and some partial breastmilk (whatever she could get from me which was very little), Kira sleeping like an angel and doing everything else that she was supposed to do. Well minus the bowel movement every day because apparently the formula can interfere with that for the first couple of days since the protein in it isn't as easy for bubs to digest.

Today when the midwife came, the first thing we did was weigh little Kira and we were so stoked to see she'd gained 90grams!! The midwife was happy, I was elated and then I proceeded to tell her about our weekend problems and what we did to correct it. She wasn't displeased, but then she didn't seem terribly pleased either. Not that I particularly gave a shit; I was NOT going to continue starving our daughter just because they all said it was "normal". She's going to call me in the morning and see how everything's going, and then we'll most likely be finishing up with her and heading up home.

I cannot wait to get back to my house and get all settled in. Plus I'll be able to upload more photos from there as well!

Meanwhile, if anyone has ANY tips for breastfeeding or milk production, please drop me a gMail. Thank you!

Introducing...

2006-02-11T21:22:00.000+10:00

Kira Rose

Born Feburary 7th, 2006, 2:11pm
52cm long, 34cm head circumference, 7lbs 11oz
Full head of dark hair, and deep blue eyes

I'm so sorry it's taken so long to post this - I have been so tired and overwhelmed and of course all the great stuff that comes with having a baby. Labour went well, and I went into a natural one shortly before midnight on the 7th; tip for moms-to-be: having a really hot shower, with the water spray focused on your lower back really DOES work with breaking your water. Or at least it did for me.

Will post more soon, hopefully in the next couple of days, as well as getting some photos uploaded to FlickR.

Quickly though... The beginning stages of the labour itself wasn't what I thought it would be. The contractions came fast and furious within minutes of my water breaking, but then would change dramatically. We started out at 4mins apart, so we called the hospital and headed in shortly after midnight; the contractions were still spacing 4-5mins apart so we thought it wouldn't be long til I had her. They checked me in, checked me out and saw I was only 2cm dilated, so I still had HEAPS of time (grr).

Around 4-5am on the 7th, they gave me a shot of morphine because my body was so stressed and tense, with the contractions spacing from anywhere between 2mins to 10-15mins, that the midwives felt I needed to relax and calm down. The morphine did nothing to ease the pain of the contractions, but it DID help me calm down and shortly thereafter I was at 5cm and fully effaced and could jump in the spa.

I'll tell you, the water submersion did absolutely NOTHING for me. It did not ease the pains at all, even though it was nice to sit in a tub of warm water. By the time I actually wanted drugs to stop the pain, I was at 10cm, and it was way too late. From the time I started pushing til the time she was born? 45mins.

And I'll happily and proudly say that D delivered her (with the watchful eye and care of the midwives nearby) AND cut her cord. I'm so happy and so proud of him for doing it - he was so concerned he'd pass out or something.

Anyway so that's that for now - I will post more later when I can.

Countdown: 3 Days to Go

2006-02-06T10:47:00.000+10:00

Still pregnant. Alot heavier today down there and alot more tight and alot more pressure, so I decided rather than go out to town, I'd stay home. Somehow it seems better that way.

Woke up through the early hours of the morning with some mild cramping and twinging which could possibly have been contractions though since they haven't really happened since, I'm thinking they're probably just braxton hicks.

Went for my trace monitoring on Saturday, got to listen to the little demonette's heartbeat again, and found out that she's still quite happy and nowhere near being stressed. I go back on Wednesday for my next antenatal appointment, at which point they'll probably do another internal (dear god help me) to find out what's going on. If my cervix hasn't opened very far or isn't as soft as they want, I'll be admitted that afternoon, have a funky little gel placed at the entrance of the cervix to soften it up and get it ready for the following day (Thursday the 9th) for induction. We're still hoping she's going to come on her own before then; I was actually wondering if all this newly accumulated pressure in my pelvic region might be the start of it?

Had a lovely BBQ last night in celebration of D's 31st birthday which is today, but since he has to work, I thought we'd do it last night when everyone wouldn't be so rushed. The food was awesome, the company was awesome and I bought him a delicious blueberry cheesecake (which was extremely rich) in lieu of a birthday cake which we ate while watching The Muppet Show!!

It wasn't on, but D had bought me the first season dvd for my birthday which has been an absolute riot to watch as well as being a very cool nostalgic trip for everyone.

I recently heard that curry can induce labour. I'm off to do some research on that.

Unplugged?

2006-02-02T07:35:00.000+10:00

I think I may have lost my plug this morning. If you want more details on that, click on the pregnancy info link and scroll all the way to the bottom: be warned though, it's not terribly pleasant to imagine, so if you don't want to hear about it in detail, don't read it.

Meanwhile, Sweety had her baby a few days ago, after only 3.5 hours of labour! Hopefully I'll be as lucky.

edit: Did lose the plug but it was this afternoon, not this morning like I had originally thought. I guess this morning was just a prelim of some kind.

Finally! Some Concrete News

2006-02-01T16:28:00.000+10:00

Well, I just got back from my antenatal appointment at the hospital, and did get the results of my bile acids test back. It's very high (17) which is not good. Last test they were only at 11, so they've sky-rocketed and the doctors don't want to take any risks.

She did give me an internal exam (which hurt like all buggery let me tell you, with her prodding and stretching and stretching and prodding) and said I am 50% effaced, and 1cm dilated. My cervix is very ripe and soft, baby's head is planted firmly where it needs to be and doc said that I could go into labour at any time now. Basically - prep for it and stay near the hospital. -bites nails-

I go back on Saturday morning for a CTG if I haven't gone into labour by then (for some reason doc thinks I will probably go into labour before the weekend is out but honestly who really knows) they will reassess me at that time, but I already have an induction scheduled for next Wed/Thurs. What this means is that if nothing's happening by next Wednesday, which is my next antenatal appt AND my sister's 18th birthday, then they will keep me in overnight (so I have to bring all my crap), apply some gel to get my cervix to open up abit more, and then start the induction on Thursday morning which consists of breaking the waters and an IV drip full of hormones to get the contractions going. Basically, D and I will be parents by next Thursday night. (HOLY SHIT!!!)

So that's where we stand right now. I'm happy that it's finally concrete, though I was all emotional as the realization hit that I'm going to be a mommy in 8 days or less. EIGHT DAYS OR LESS. HOLY SHIT.

Oh and I think I might have felt my first contraction (which we think was a false one) earlier this morning. There was no pain associated with it, more it felt like my ab muscles had just gotten a giant workout from doing situps.

In other news, I turn THIRTY today and D had planned on taking me out for dinner since I did plan on going home tonight to celebrate it with him. Those plans went right out the window as Mum thinks it's wise I stay close to the hospital just in case, even though I will have to go back home probably tomorrow to get all my crap and the demonette's crap and bring back down...just in case.

I suppose this means I should actually finish buying all my crap I'm going to need, eh? Nothing like waiting until the very last minute (almost literally).

Countdown: 37 Weeks, 6 Days (...or 15 days to go)

2006-01-27T08:06:00.000+10:00

I know I haven't updated in ages but I've been really rather busy. We've almost got the nursery finished, and ended up taking the bassinet down to Mamalas so she could do some finishing touches to it. (I will post pictures later on)

Let's see... Oh also I have been pretty busy with appointments at the hospital which I'll do a quick recap of:

January 22nd, 2006
Had the tour of the hospital today, and got to see where all the birthing rooms were. There are only 4 of them, but they are quite big and spacious, and all include a spa tub which I am very excited about. According to the midwife who led all of us through (there were probably 20 or so of us) there have been some "accidents" where babies have been born IN the tub, but mostly (unfortunately) they get the mums out in time and get them on the bed to deliver, using the tub only as pain management. Either way, I get to use the tub which I'm ECSTATIC over.

The hospital also has 4 private single rooms, which are generally reserved for women who have had complications, or who have had to undergo a cesarian. The midwife did say when we come in to deliver, if the rooms are available and we ask for one, then we'd most likely get one. I'm a little torn on that because part of me wants to have a private room, and another part of me would rather share a ward with other women so I'll at least have someone to chat with.

January 23rd, 2006
Went in for the second round of Cholestasis testing, as well as having my liver rechecked and a general bloodcell count done to make sure I wasn't anemic. Again I fasted, but unlike last time, did NOT have a mint before hand, just incase. I do have to say though, how pissed off we were in the beginning when I went to down to pathology close to where Mamala lives. It turns out they could not do the bloodtest for me, EVEN THOUGH the Doctor I saw told me it was perfectly alright and I did not need to come back to the hospital to have the blood drawn.

It turns out, I did have to come back to the hospital. So, there I am at Pathology around 845am (hungry, mind you) only to be told I now have to head roughly 20mins in the opposite direction back to the hospital. Okay, so, off we go. Twenty minutes later we arrive, and they make me wait an additional ten minutes. (Even hungrier now) The blood gets taken at 930am and they send me out to go have breakfast - finally!

I did wake up a couple of times through the very early morning hours scratching at my arm like a complete maniac, and had to apply TWO coats of DermaVeen to stop the itching. Since I've only really been itching when I'm really hot, or I've been out in the sun, today we realized that yesterday I had spent a lot of time in the sun (minus sunscreen no less) and therefore my right arm got considerably pinker than normal, thus the scratching. It even feels like more of a sunburn itch than anything and stings if I scratch too often or too hard.

January 25th, 2006
Antenatal appointment at the hospital to review the results of my bloodwork. Got a new doctor this time, Dr Ahmed, who was really very nice albeit a little hard to understand at times. He went over my file ALOT more thoroughly than any of the other doctors, including telling me that I actually had THREE due dates! I only knew of two! Turns out though, that we're going back to using the February 11th due date (again) because two of my ultrasounds AND my LMP correspond with it.

My liver test came back perfectly normal, which was confusing to me since if my bile salts were high (at 11) then wouldn't my liver ALSO have some abnormality? I posed this question to Dr Ahmed and he said that while it's usual to have a liver problem while having cholestasis, that's not always the case... And in some cases the bloodtest doesn't reveal any problem either, even when there IS one. (Science is so great, is it not?) My general bloodwork came back perfect as well and I'm not anemic (which I already knew), and my bloodpressure is also perfect.

It's all really very confusing to me.

After talking with Dr Ahmed, he has decided he doesn't feel the induction is necessary at this point, but we still don't have the bile acid results back yet, and those won't come back until next week, so I have another appointment on Wednesday to review those and probably come to some kind of solid decision then. Dr Ahmed told me that based on what we've talked about, he'd rather wait as long as possible and NOT induce me (since it's better for the baby that she come when she's ready) but since I'm at 37 weeks, I am clinically full term now and it would be okay to deliver any time between now and 40 weeks. (If she happens to come on her own, I mean)

He checked my uterine size and it's a stunning 38cm long, making my little demonette quite healthy and a good size herself. Dr Ahmed said if I was any shorter than I am, then I would be having a BIG baby but given that I'm so tall, he is quite confident she's a good size and her heartbeat is strong and incredibly healthy.

He did say that he still wanted me to have the trace monitoring (CTG) done of her heartbeat just to make sure she wasn't under any stress (relating to the cholestasis), but given that all 4 birthing suites were full and there was up to a 5 hour wait to have that done, I opted to make an appointment for Thursday to come back in. A five hour wait would have put me back at the hospital around 9pm and that's my bedtime just about!

So there, that brings us back up to speed for the few days I haven't posted since being away from the house, staying with Mamala. Yes she has a computer but her computer room gets unbearably hot and I can't sit in there for any length of time to type out a post OR go reading everyone elses!

Yesterday we did go back in for the CTG, and D came in with me as well. I was led into one of the birthing suites and hopped up onto the bed, and then two fetal monitors were strapped to my belly. I can't tell you how beautiful hearing her heartbeat is. I can't tell you how hypnotic it is, and how it was lulling both D and I to sleep. I can't tell you how much we truly missed hearing it once the CTG was done and midwife Heather told us her heartbeat looked normal and that she was not under any stress at all. (We already knew that of course, but sometimes you just need to let the docs do what they want to do)

So afterward, we basically came back to Mamalas, packed up our stuff and headed home. I don't need to be back down that way until next Wednesday (which happens to be my big three-oh birthday and which I had totally forgotten about, being so preoccupied with when bubby is going to get here and getting her room all prepped) so there was no point in me staying. Starting the following weekend however, I will be at Mamala's place until the baby is born because she only lives 15mins from the hospital, whereas I live an hour from it.

On our way home yesterday afternoon, we took some detours and didn't quite get lost, but for a little while we weren't sure where we were, and right in the middle of nowhere - at the end of the road no less - was a little teeny town called Cabbage Tree Point, located nearish to Jacobs Well. We stumbled into this quaint little town quite by accident, and when I say it was located at the end of the road, that's exactly what I mean. Right at the end of the road was a jetty, and beyond that, quite a large river. But it was so lovely to see; I love taking detours and ending up in little out of the way places.

Tomorrow marks mine and D's ONE YEAR anniversary and to celebrate we are heading up to the city and staying in the delicious Marriott Hotel so I probably won't be blogging again until sometime on Sunday.

Hope everyone has a fantastic weekend!

Update

2006-01-20T16:26:00.000+10:00

Just got back from the antenatal clinic, and I have some mixed results. Overall I think it was a good visit, but I'm not entirely sure.

Firstly the OB changed my due date. Again. They've decided to go by the dates of my ultrasound, which makes my due date now Feb 21st (again) and not Feb 11th. Because of this, they've decided to restest me for cholestasis, as well as do a complete liver check - all done via blood. All of that will be done on Monday, and I go back on Wednesday to discuss the results with whoever is on duty.

Okay so that being said.. the OB I spoke with today isn't too concerned with the bile salt test results I already have. She said they were high, but since I'm not experiencing any major itching, that she's not going to get too concerned until the new bloodwork comes back. My itching isn't constant, it doesn't really wake me up through the night and it generally isn't something of a discomfort, so she wasn't TOO concerned about it.

I also mentioned the black spots I saw the other afternoon when I got up from the couch, but she did not seem concerned about that in the slightest. (I'm not really sure what to think of that, but for now I'm taking her word for it)

So when I go back on Wednesday to discuss the results of my new bloodwork, I am also being scheduled for what's called a "trace" which is where they hook me up to some machine and monitor the baby's heartbeat for awhile. Apparently this can tell them whether or not the baby is okay, or under stress, etc etc. The OB says she wants this monitoring to go on twice a week until my 38th week (which is now 2 weeks away and not 1) and all the while constantly monitoring my itchies to make sure they do not increase. At this point, the OB doesn't think it necessary to induce me, but again they won't really know anything until the second lot of results come back and we talk on Wednesday.

She was very happy with baby's heartbeat, which is still very nice and strong, plus there was LOTS of fetal activity today during the external exam, and we also found out that her head is nice and low. Also next week, they'll do a vaginal exam to find out exactly where the baby's at and feel how ripe the cervix is. At least the good news about all of this, is that if I do have to be induced, bubby's in the right position and fairly low, even though I haven't actually "engaged" yet.

As of today and my new (old) due date of Feb 21st, I'm back to being 35wks 3days along instead of 36wks and 7 days.

It's all terribly confusing but I am staying positive, and as long as there are no signs of fetal distress then I'm perfectly happy letting everything go as a normal pregnancy would. If the tests come back in a not-so-positive light, then they WILL induce in my 38th week; I guess they just want to be sure and not prematurely induce me when there would be no need. I guess this is a good thing.

Whew, that seems like so much to absorb, and I don't think it's all fully sunk in quite yet. I am left feeling a little... frustrated at the seemingly indecisive nature of all this testing, but by the same token, I'd rather know for sure than just be induced on a whim only to find out later there was no need.

In other more positive news, my strepB tests all came back negative so that's one less thing to worry about.

More Shopping

2006-01-19T07:44:00.000+10:00

I'm heading out today, down the coast to Mamala's place where I shall be until tomorrow evening. Tomorrow is my appointment with the senior OB at the hospital, so I'm very much looking forward to that, and finding out exactly what's going on.

Today, however, seems like it's going to be quite busy. I have to shower and be ready to leave in roughly an hour and a half; from here we're going straight to the Mall so my older brother can do his grocery shopping. It's possible we'll end up seeing one of Mamala's friends for abit while we're in there, and then I need to have a chat with the people of Centerlink. (That should be barrels of fun)

After that, we are going to head around to the place where I bought my chest of drawers from - basically it's a silent auction place, and I won a lovely chest of drawers for $70 woo!! - and I also need to chat with the people I'm buying my carseat from to see if they can install it for us on Saturday.

I also want to buy a couple more skirts and add some credit to my cellphone - man I can already see the dollars whizzing by.

Oh and I woke up this morning (again) with an aching pelvis and tops of my thighs.

Happy Birthday Little Brother!

2006-01-17T23:07:00.000+10:00

Good lord my littlest brother turns 24 today. TWENTY-FOUR. It's so weird; I always thought he was around the 26 mark. That says alot of positive things about him for sure.

Anyway we went out and had dinner at Sizzler, the whole family, and an immensely good time was had by all. He took off after dinner and headed down to some friends' place to get good and sloshed, and doesn't need to worry about driving home since he's crashing there. I'm so proud of him for being so responsible. (insert cheezy grin)

In other news, I did call my Dr today to ask whether or not I needed to be retested for the cholestasis. He pretty much said no, because once it comes back positive it doesn't really change, but beyond that, the test won't come back until around the 38th week mark or after it, and by that point we'll have needed to make arrangements for the induction so it would be rather pointless. He did inform me that I will be seeing the senior OB on Friday, rather than the midwife, to discuss all the options, risks and benefits, etc etc etc. I don't feel nearly as nervous or as stressed out as I did yesterday or even earlier today. It helped to talk about it a little bit, and I have come to the conclusion that bringing our daughter into the world 2 weeks ahead of schedule is a GREAT THING.

Anyway, so that's where we're at right now. I won't know anything else until I chat with the OB on Friday, but I'm feeling good and positive and I'm sure that will magnify after my appointment. I'll keep you updated!

Trying Not to Worry

2006-01-17T07:50:00.000+10:00

My Doctor called me yesterday afternoon. He called to tell me he got the results back regarding the Cholestasis testing, and from what I understand (which may be totally different to what he said), he is going to recommend I be induced at 38 weeks as a prevention. He said my liver was normal, but the bile salt count in my blood was at 11. He said this would be somewhat normal if I had eaten the morning of my bloodtest, but since I had fasted, this number is very high and so therefore, is not good or normal, at all.

He was faxing down his recommendation to the antenatal clinic yesterday, and I go back to see them on Friday. I am 36 weeks and 3 days along, as of today, which means if they induce, we will likely see our little girl the last week of January, beginning week of February. And that's if the dates are even correct.

You might recall a smallish problem we had with that. The Doctor/Midwives didn't know if they should go by the date of my LMP, or by the first ultrasound report. In the beginning they went by the ultrasound report which would have made my due date February 21st. But then, because I was a "week in advance" with everything, they decided that the dates were wrong, and that I was due February 11th.

My Doctor did suggest yesterday that I get retested for the Cholestasis, and the results would come back just in time to decide what we are going to do - at least by my estimations. They need to induce or cesarian by 38 weeks, because apparently after that, the risk of stillbirth increases and so does the risk of sudden fetal death syndrome. Obviously we'd all rather be safe than sorry.

So, I told D last night and he was as supportive and as loving as ever. I rang Mamala yesterday afternoon and told her about it; she said the results didn't feel right to her, so I think she'd like it if I was retested as well. She kept telling me not to worry, not to stress, everything would be fine... Much the same things D has been telling me since last night.

But I can't help it. And I know it's no good to stress over it, because the Midwives may not think it's anything to worry about (they said they'd call me if they did, and so far they haven't) and I am going to see them on Friday and ask a bunch of questions anyway so I'm probably causing myself a whole lot of needless stress right now, which I know isn't good for the baby.

And I know it does no good to worry about it anyway because if the retest comes back saying I do have cholestasis for sure, there still isn't anything I can do about it. All I wanted was a nice, normal pregnancy, without any complications.

I'm not going to wallow in self-pessimism or defeat though. There's nothing wrong with our baby; she's just going to greet us 2 weeks earlier than originally expected. Let's just hope that when I get induced, she decides it's okay to come out and won't get distressed or anything like that, causing me to have an emergency cesarian.

Quick Recap of Events

2006-01-13T22:10:00.000+10:00

Had my 36th week antenatal appointment today at the hospital, and it went fabulously well. Baby's heartrate is 120 beats per minute, which is a significant drop from 2 weeks ago when it was 154bpm, but it's still very strong and very healthy so Midwife Ann was happy. Bubs wasn't moving around AS much during this exam, which I think is mainly due to Ann's non-gouging of my stomache (she was really very gentle) although she was gouging about in the pelvic region trying to locate bubby's head. Turns out she's moved abit lower down, so she's still in the correct position for birth.

Didn't get my cholestasis results back yet - they were sent to the Mater hospital in Brisbane, so they said they'd fax the results to the antenatal clinic as soon as they got them in, and if it wasn't good, then the midwife or doctor on duty would give me a call. I didn't hear anything back this afternoon, so if I don't hear anything by Wednesday or Thursday next week, I'll take that as a really good sign.

Also had my last round of blood tests done; checking for hemoglobin count and antibodies once again, as well as a non-blood-related test which involved swabbing some sensitive areas with an extra extra EXTRA long cotton bud, for strepB. This is done routinely, so if they discover that I have strepB, then they'll feed me antibiotics via IV during labour so it doesn't get passed along to the baby. Guess I won't know that either until next week.

I do know that I thought it very inconsiderate that I had to do the actual swabbing considering I couldn't see down there at all and had to rely on depth perception. Turns out I don't think that worked so well, so we'll see. Hopefully I did it right. (I still think the midwife shoulda done it!)

Afterward Mamala and I did some shopping for bubs... Got her pram off layby (pictures to come), as well as bought some nappies (diapers) and nappy pins, a new bassinet pillow - I wanted to get the mattress but they were out of stock - 2 mattress protectors, some tiny little coat hangers and an absolutely melt-your-heart skirt that I plan on bringing her home in. I just have to find a top now to go with it, and buy some socks too. Oh and I put some more money on our carseat which we'll pick up in the next couple of weeks.

Very busy day today, and even though I walked around ALOT, my ~~feet~~ squish bags didn't get AS puffy as they have been lately. I think it helped that I was in aircon for most of the day.

And speaking of aircon... Apparently we're having someone come out to the house tomorrow to give the owner a quote on having aircon put into the house! OH PRAISE JESUS!! Hopefully this means that the owner will put in a reverse-cycle split system and we will have AIRCONDITIONING!!! Yes I'm getting my hopes up and all blown out of proportion. I hope they will not be dashed.

Oh oh oh and the most important thing... My previous post about the Huntsman spider that ran across my feet while I was sleeping? Well! We got home tonight, I stepped out of the car, turned around and holy shit... There was a big old Huntsman sitting on our garage wall. My flesh immediately began crawling and I dashed in the house to hide and tremble, while reminding D to get his camera and take photos. He did, and got amazingly close to The Beast. I shall have photos for you soon... And yes, the one he took photos of tonight was the same size as the one that ran across my feet.

And, rather than kill The Beast tonight, he got the broom and shooed it outside. He then proceeded to spray the interior of the garage with surface spray, so if The Beast does venture back into the garage, he will die a most horrible death. There's only so much I will do to keep a Beast of Such Magnitude alive.

Now, however, I must retire for the evening and go lay down. It seems my parasitic demonette has lodged her foot once again firmly into my ribcage, which is making it difficult to sit here and type. Of course, having just typed that, her foot miraculously dislodged and I am no longer in discomfort, but I am, however, out of things to say.

Hope everyone had a fantastic Friday the 13th!

I Can See It From Here

2006-01-11T07:45:00.000+10:00

My due date, you know. February 11th. Exactly FOUR WEEKS from today. Now would be the appropriate time to say "Begin the Countdown!" but in truth that started about two weeks ago. Am I excited? Oh hell yes! Am I nervous? No, not so much.

But I do have a couple of niggling concerns.

#1) If my water doesn't break, how will I know when I've begun labour? I've heard that it feels similar to bowel cramping, so if that's true then how will I know the difference?

#2) I've heard that for the first week or two, new parents (specially moms) don't want to deal with any phone calls or neighbours, regardless of the reason. If that's the case, and that's me, how do I diplomatically say, "I'm sorry, I don't want to talk to you or anyone right now. Call me back in about a month."

I used to be concerned I wouldn't hear her crying since I was/am typically a heavy sleeper. I've been told by so many of my new-mom friends that this goes away, and your sleeping patterns change so much that you will wake up all the time and possibly get out of bed to make sure she's still breathing. Since I had a little "incident" at Mamalas the other week, which I did not post about then but will now, I am quite convinced I will not sleep through her night cries and be able to get up and feed her or cuddle her or change her, or whatever.

Okay so now the incident I referred to... Well if you're a fairly regular reader, then you will know of my aversion to spiders. Particularly Huntsman. (Just as a warning, you may not want to click that link if you're at all squeamish about looking at spiders, particularly big ones) For the record, and I think I have mentioned this before, Huntsman are not venemous and therefore will not kill you if bitten. But I have heard their bite feels like someone's just punched the ever living crap out of you. Owwie.

Okay but I digress here. Some of you have seen some of the spiders we have around our house, and they're a bit further down on the right on my FlickR badge if you'd like to have a look. Only one in the spider set is a Huntsman and it's a baby, so it's going to be a wee bit hard to describe just how big the one I'm going to tell you about, was.

Take a look at the palm of your hand. If you're an adult of average size, then it's legs would have dangled OVER your palm and on your fingers. I hope you can appreciate the size of which I'm talking about, even though if you're not familiar with them, you may very well be having a hard time with that. Trust me when I say I am not exaggerating.

Now... Knowing how big that spider was, I shall continue with my story. This happened a couple of weeks back when I headed south to visit Mamala one of the weeks I had my antenatal appointment at the hospital. Mamala had given up her bed to me, and was sleeping on the single spare bed in the spare room (she's so nice!). Because it was so stinking hot that night (at least to me) I chose to sleep without any covers on, which is very normal for me these days.

I'm sure you can see where this is going.

I woke up around 130am after feeling what sort of felt like a very strong wind across my feet. My eyes snapped open, I flicked on the light and I stared at the bottom of my bed, and at my feet and tried to wrap my brain around the fact that while it may have felt like a strong wind across my feet, or perhaps even blowing the sheets across my feet, somewhere in my head I knew MUCH differently.

Panic did not yet set in, but I knew instinctively what it was. Yes, it was the aforementioned LARGE spider. No, it was not down near my feet at the bottom of the bed, but I knew it was down there somewhere. My heart was pounding, my limbs were a little shaky and I leaped out of the bed (after carefully checking the floor and walls beside me to make sure said monster was not there) and stood at the head of the bed, staring down at the end of the bed, as though by some miracle I would grow xray vision and be able to see through sheets. And a mattress.

Since this didn't happen, I leaned slightly forward, ever so slightly, to peek around the bottom edge of the bed. And then I stood bolt upright for I had seen it. Not all of it, mind you. Just the tips of it's legs. But it was there, on the edge of the bed and IT HAD CRAWLED ON ME.

I needed to make my escape! But how? There were only two ways out of her room and one of them involved walking past the monster clinging to the edge of the bed. The other involved walking (or sprinting!) across the bed and onto the floor on the opposite side of the room. I wasn't sure I wanted to do that because any movement I would make, might very well cause The Beast to leap onto the floor and run in my direction (because that's my luck), or, turn and run UP ONTO the bed where I would have been standing. I also knew that if I chose to run across the bed, though thankfully with my leg span it would have been one step onto the mattress and one step onto the floor, even though she's got a queen sized bed, then I might have ended up coming down hard on the floor, thus waking Mamala up, and scaring the (literal) crap out of Nanna who lives below on the ground floor.

During all of this thought, maybe half a minute passed and I knew the longer I stood there, the more chance I had of The Beast crawling up toward me. Or onto the floor and then around toward me. (Huntsman run incredibly fast as a general rule and will also jump a little) I had little choice. I sprung across the bed (not a bad feat when you're 8 months pregnant) and lightly landed on the floor on the opposite side of the room so I didn't disturb anyone. I should mention at this point, I have not screamed. (I'm very brave you see)

I got to the door, actually just outside it, and it was a battle of wills against myself: Turn around! No for gods sake don't turn around, you don't want to know! TURN AROUND! NO! I ignored the angel telling me not to turn around, and instead listened to the devil who was cackling gleefully on my left. I turned around, slowly.

And sucked in a giant gobful of air which created a minor vacuum in the immediate vicinity where I was standing. There it was, ladies and gentlemen. On the end edge of Mamala's bed, on the quilt, hanging out in all of it's magnificently huge glory, staring at me. It's entirely probable that this spider was as terrified of me as I was of it. Moreso probably, because I'm six feet tall and it's what, half a centimeter tall?

Anyway, so I woke up Mamala and made her come and kill it for me. (Remember my previous braveness? It was a sham. A SHAM!) I spent the rest of the night with the light on and waking up every hour to make sure I didn't have another one on or near me. The good thing about Huntsman is that they're not terribly social spiders, so they do not generally roam around in small groups. This means that it's very rare to have more than one in your house at any given time - this is a GOOD THING.

Okay, so! This is why I am of the firm belief that I will no longer have any problems waking up to hear my baby fussing or crying. If I can wake up to a light spider touch, then I will certainly wake up to a screaming human. I am no longer worried of that. Maybe I should be greatful that The Beast chose to teach me that lesson.

You know what else though? I'm going to miss being pregnant. As much as I want my little demonic parasite here with me, I'm really going to miss having her inside me and watching her bounce and jiggle and wrestle with my organs until she got comfortable. I'm going to miss the hunger pains and dizziness she used to cause me if I didn't eat every couple of hours. I'm going to miss her hiccuping and the way she responds to D's singing and his conversation. In as little as four weeks, and as much as six weeks, we will have her here with us, drastically changing and improving our lives.

Of course, there are some things I'm not going to miss, and actually will be quite happy they're done with.

I'm not going to miss my swollen feet. (My brother lovingly refers to them now as "squish bags") I'm not going to miss peering over the watermelon to tearfully stare at the fat little piglets attached to my bubbled up feet and ankles.

I'm not going to miss the pelvic aches and pain. Oh dear lord no I AM NOT!

I'm not going to miss struggling to get up off the couch from a horizontal position; or needing help to get up off the floor when I so stupidly think how wonderful it would be to lay down and rest on it. (You'd be surprised how often I choose the floor over the couch or bed, particularly at Mamalas)

I am not going to miss the leg cramps! Oh my god those are annoying. To wake up in the middle of the night with a severe charlie horse gripping your calf is not a pleasant experience! And it's infinitely WORSE when it's in both legs at the same time!

I'm so not going to miss the itchy skin and wickedly itchy boobs/nipples. I'm so sick and tired of constantly scratching them and not being able to find very much in the way of relief.

But at the same time, as much as I'm not going to miss all of that stuff, I think somewhere inside me, in a weird way, I am going to miss it. These things have been symbolic in a pregnancy I was so positive I would never experience, and yet here I am, experiencing it to the fullest. After all, taking the good with the bad is all part of it, isn't it?

New Fans

2006-01-10T07:33:00.000+10:00

So ~~our~~ my fan died over the weekend. It may have had something to do with the fact that we had some stormage, and a bunch of power surges which may have been the reason for the motor suddenly dying. Or it might have been because it was an old fan, I have no idea. All I know is that I almost flew into panic mode at the prospect of not having a fan blowing directly on me as I sat at my computer.

Yesterday, we headed into town so my brother could drop off his form, and then we headed into the nearby new shopping mall. We made a beeline for K*Mart and then wandered around aimlessly, unable to find the fan section, because you know what stores are like and how well labelled everything is. We ended up attacking some store personnel and my brother wrestled her into telling us where their secret stash of fans was, so off we trotted and picked up two. TWO fans now! And damn do they kick out some air. It's awesome.

Luckily though, it wasn't that hot yesterday. I think the top only got to around 28C but again with no breeze made it feel abit hotter than it actually was.

I also took back my second copy of "Me, Myself and Irene" and exchanged it for Robin Hood: Men in Tights and Forest Gump with an additional purchase of Batman Begins because D wanted it. And because it was (miraculously) under $20.

Still haven't heard anything from the travel agent(s). I think I'm well and truly disgusted enough to never use one again. But that horse isn't one I feel like beating on at the moment since I'm in a rather jolly mood.

D's friend sent pictures of their baby girl last night, and she is so gorgeous. He cannot wait until our little demonette is here, and neither can I. We're so excited and want her here now now now! I can't believe we only have a month to go. ONE MONTH.

Someone Has Some Explaining to Do

2006-01-08T08:41:00.000+10:00

Back in March of last year, D and I purchased our tickets to travel from Canada to Arizona (where we parked for 2 weeks) before flying on home to Australia by way of New Zealand. When we purchased our tickets, we originally wanted to fly Qantas because quite frankly, I have a huge aversion to flying on any other airline. In my opinion Qantas is the safest airline, and since it's my life we're discussing, nobody can convince me otherwise.

Well, at least up until the point of our ticket purchase last year, nobody could. But you see, then we met the travel agent Liv, who convinced me that Air New Zealand is just as safe (if not safer) than Qantas, and that I would be perfectly fine flying on that airline. Obviously she was correct in that, since here I am today, writing out a post.

I have just digressed, though. When we were speaking with Liv, we told her we wanted one-way tickets to fly to Australia, because we couldn't really forsee us coming back to Canada anytime soon. She convinced us that it would be ultimately cheaper to book roundtrip tickets (and in actual fact, it was) and while she couldn't make them open-ended, she could put them up to 12 months in advance for the return trip. Okay fine, we said. Let's do that. We thought there would be no problem, but as she was typing up things on her little computer, suddenly there was a problem. Now she can't do a return trip to Australia so far in advance with Air New Zealand (but she could have with Qantas). This means of course, that she can only put the return trip as far in advance as February of '06, but before that time, we should contact her directly (or if not being able to, contact anyone in any Flight Centre, regardless of where we are) to have the change made to our return date, resetting to May of '06. She also told us that this would be done free of charge because she was unable to set the return dates one year from the date of our travel. We would get one free date change, and thereafter it would cost us money.

No problem, we said. Actually it's better that we do it this way. We said. Essentially that gave us a lot of leeway in which to change our return flight and go back whenever we wanted, up until May of '06.

After chatting with some people yesterday, this is not so. We went up to the Brisbane Airport in order to talk with Air New Zealand about having our return flights changed and the tickets reprinted without having to wait for them to come in the mail. This is around the time we found out that we do not, infact, get a free flight change. Rather, our flight change is going to cost us US$150 each.

You can well imagine how royally pissed off we were. Are.

We were nice though. We did not scream at the nice lady from the Air New Zealand desk. We were not mean or rude to her. She sent an email to our travel agent, and is now awaiting response from her. (I should point out that I have sent several emails to our travel agent, Liv, and have not heard one word back from her)

From there we headed home, stopping at the nearby shopping Mall to go and tell our tale of woe, horror and misfortune to another person at Flight Centre. We were lucky enough to have the good fortune of dealing with the lovely Allie, who also sent off an email to Liv asking her to call us, or email us, or something, because we are her clients and we are NOT happy in the slightest. Allie then informs us, that basically Liv had told us a bunch of bullshit; that Air New Zealand typically does not offer free flight changes, BUT THAT QANTAS DOES! Qantas, the ORIGINAL airline I wanted to travel on, you'll remember. She also said, that unfortunately if Air New Zealand told us it was going to cost an additional US$150 to make the flight change, then that would be correct and we would have to pay it.

Obviously, we are not happy with this and we stupid enough not to get any of our original itinerary in writing regarding the free flight change. What the hell were we thinking?

Okay, so now that part is over with, while we are waiting to hear from either Liv or Allie, or the woman at Air New Zealand, I have this question: We bought the tickets in CANADA. Why then, does our flight change require the money to be in US FUNDS? WHY is it not in CANADIAN funds where we purchased them?

Oh and PS, I went for my Cholestasis test on Friday. I won't get the results back for another week yet, but fingers crossed I don't have it.

Can't Wait to Get my Ribs Back

2006-01-05T08:21:00.000+10:00

Last night was a little bit of a rough night. D and I headed to bed around 1030pm I suppose, or thereabouts, and although I had been fairly uncomfortable for most of the day - bubby's feet in my ribs, not so much the heat yesterday thank god - I figured as soon as I lay down, I would at least be comfortable.

Not so.

"Aha!" gurbles the small child. "She's laying down which means I can stretch out!"

And stretch out she did. I felt the whole thing, a full body stretch that started with her hands all but fluttering out of my general pelvic region, to her feet which were all but gouged up into my throat. And there she stayed for a good minute or so - you know what those really good stretches are like; you don't ever want them to end, do you? So of course, I can't really blame her for staying that way and enjoying every minute of it.

Once she was done, I heaved a great sigh of relief and attempted to lay back again, to get comfortable. It just wasn't meant to be. One foot right up into the ribs, pressing against them with her heel for all she's worth. It's entirely possible I'll be enrolling my child in the ballet as soon as she's old enough: it would be a sin not to further develop those leg muscles outside of the womb.

As I tossed and turned and grumbled with the irritation of having a tiny foot jammed in between two pieces of bone, I moved to my left side thinking that maybe she'd fall to the left and get out of that very delicate area. Again, I was wrong.

There's going to be no second guessing this kid; she's the one who's going to be teaching US what to do, I can see it.

Grumbling still further, I flipped onto my right side, pillow wedged firmly beneath the giant melon and instantly found relief. It was heavenly! At least for me. The wriggling parasite within had to move herself again to get comfortable, but at least the foot was gone from my ribcage.

I indulged in a maniacal laugh and happily fell asleep.

Taking on the World, One Tub at a Time

2006-01-04T08:15:00.000+10:00

Do you have any idea just how hard it is to get in and out of a bathtub when you're 8 months pregnant? Well, if you're 8 months pregnant, I'm sure you do! Let me tell you, when you gaze down at that bathtub and think to yourself, "There's so much room in there, I'll be able to float!" you're wrong, DEAD WRONG.

When you sit down, it's like your ass and thighs have magically widened and you don't have even a third of the room you once thought you had. And then you try and get comfortable, somehow mangling your legs together in what appears to be some version of crossing them at the calves, with your knees resting on either side of the porcelain as the water floats up, up, up and around your belly, not quite being able to submerge it, but giving you enough bouyancy that if you close your eyes you can imagine you're out at sea. In a very cramped lifeboat. But it can be done!

But because it was so absolutely dreadfully, unbearably hot when you got in the tub, you don't mind the crampiness so much because you're partially submerged under nearly-cold water, and the cool southerly breeze is dancing across your bare skin through the open window directly above you, and you drift off to sleep for an hour, not thinking about the god-awful time you're going to have trying to get GET OUT of the tub later on.

And then you wake up. And while you're loving every minute of that bordering-on-cold tub of water, you're also shivering a little bit because even though it was so hot an hour earlier, that your skin stuck to itself, it has since cooled down and isn't nearly so hot and the cool breeze dancing across your skin feels colder and colder and colder. So you do some kinky manoeuvre in order to slide your hand down under your ass and past your thighs to reach the plug to pull it out so the water can drain away, and then do you begin the arduous process of trying to extract yourself from the shallow, porcelain apparatus.

You're not quite sure how you're going to achieve the actual getting to your feet stage, because your hands (and body) are quite prune-like by now, and are also somewhat slippery from being submerged for an hour. Isn't it funny that you can wipe your pruned hands on the towel for five solid minutes, and yet they're still sopping wet when you touch the sides of the bath in order to hoist yourself upward? It's like your skin is so waterlogged that it won't ever be dry again.

But, somehow you manage to thrust yourself upward while clinging vainly to the sides of the tub, hoping like hell you don't slip and fall. And as you stand on your feet, completely upright and overjoyed, you want to do a small victory dance right there in the open window, for all to see. But you don't do that victory dance. Instead, you grin stupidly at yourself in the mirror for not only being able to get INTO the tub, but now also OUT OF it while you're eight months pregnant.

And then, as you sit at the table this morning, recapping the highlights of yesterday, you hope with all your heart and soul that today will NOT be as hot as yesterday because as much as you're proud of yourself for being able to get in and out of a bathtub (something you USED to take for granted!) you really don't want to have to go through it all again if you can help it.

Recap of 2005

2006-01-03T08:10:00.000+10:00

Found this over at Luvs+Autumn and figured I'd snag it. You should snag it too:

1) Was 2005 a good year for you? Best year of my life.

2) What was your favorite moment of the year? Landing in Toronto, Ontario, Canada at around 1030pm on January 28th.

3) What was your least favorite moment of the year? Having to spend the first month of a new year with someone I pretty well never wanted to see again. Ever. And then have to put up with his abusive bullshit for 2 months after I'd moved out.

4) Where were you when 2005 began? With my ex, watching The Twilight Zone marathon and trying not to do anything that would make him mad at me.

5) Who were you with? With my ex.

6) Where will you be when 2005 ends? Well considering I'm doing this late... I was at home, in bed.

7) Who will you be with when 2005 ends? My fiance.

8) Did you keep your new years resolution of 2005? I don't make them.

9) Do you have a new years resolution for 2006? No...

10) Did you breakup with anyone in 2005? Nope!

11) Did you make any new friends in 2005? Yes

12) Who is your favorite new friend? I don't really have a favourite

13) What was your favorite month of 2005? Oh so many... February (my birthday, my fiance's birthday and my mother's and sisters birthdays), May (came home to Australia), July (found out I was 9 weeks pregnant AND got engaged)

14) Did you travel outside of your country in 2005? Yes, to Canada and the US

15) What different states did you travel to in 2005? While in the US? Arizona and California. While in Australia? Just Queensland and New South Wales.

16) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2005? No.

17) Did you miss anybody in the past year? Yes

18) What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2005? This one always makes me think. I haven't been watching alot of movies but... probably Lemony Snicket.

19) What was your favorite song from 2005? "Holiday" by Green Day.

20) What was your favorite record from 2005? Curtain Call, by Eminem, I suppose.

21) How many concerts did you see in 2005? None, I don't go to them.

22) Did you have a favorite concert in 2005? No.

23)Did you drink a lot of alchohol in 2005? I wouldn't say alot, no...

24) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2005? Yeah well, I was sick so it felt like I was always on them.

25) How many people did you sleep with in 2005? 1.

26) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year? No.

27) What was the worst lie someone told you in 2005? Um... Well I'm sure it's not the worst but it's the only one I can think of off the top of my head: "I don't read your blog."

28) Did you treat somebody badly in 2005? Yes.

29) Did somebody treat you badly in 2005? Yes.

30) How much money did you spend in 2005? Er, no idea.

31) What was your proudest moment of 2005? Oh god... Coming out of denial over my pregnancy AND getting engaged.

32) What was your most embarrassing moment of 2005? Being in denial of my pregnancy. (I rather chose to think I had breast cancer instead)

33) If you could go back in time to any moment of 2005 and change something, what would it be? I would not change a thing.

34.) The best thing that happened to you in 2005? Meeting my fiance.

35) What are your plans for 2006? I plan on giving birth to my child, but after that, I have absolutely NO idea. And I'm looking forward to it!!

Not Fair and It Makes Me Want to Cry

2006-01-02T20:23:00.000+10:00

It figures I'd only hear about this Blingo thing AFTER I'd left the US and come back home to Australia. This ranks right up there with that really nifty jewellery site I want to buy from, but can't.

Come on guys, Australia needs some love too!

Busy Little Bees

2006-01-02T18:51:00.000+10:00

Today was a rather busy one for D and I. We woke up late (for us) at around 730am, and started the day off with a cuppa tea - green for him, regular for me - and both sat down to play a little WoW before we got stuck into the housecleaning. This didn't last too long however, as a few power surges knocked us offline and we both took that as a sign that we needed to get offline and begin the cleanfest.

And clean we did! I vacuumed the entire tile floor of the dining/family room, hallways and laundry, which took me about an hour or so, I suppose, and then I decided I would do the shower. Of course, it was so stinking hot that I was looking forward to cleaning the shower because it meant cool water, and the chance to get WET! Huzzah! So I cleaned out the entire shower, top to bottom, scrubbing down the tiles in varying positions: on my feet, on my ass, on my knees, and even squatting. Let me tell you, the workout I had was amazing. Of course I'm being facetious; my back was protesting rather painfully after having done all of that, but it was well worth it as I stood infront of the fan, and having the air blow across my wet skin.

That sounds only mildly pornographic, doesn't it? Getting wet, various positions... That should make for some interesting websearch hits. Teehee.

Anyway... While I was doing all of this, D was cleaning up the loungeroom and the nursery, vacuuming and then he was in the garage with the wooden changing table, sanding it down and readying it for repainting, as well as going through some of the boxes in the garage that haven't been unpacked yet AND prior to all of this, he rearranged the loungeroom for me and thoroughly cleaned it out. Now we both love the new look of the loungeroom since it feels so much more cozy and inviting - though we do have a lot of dead space at the moment, but that will quickly be filled as we purchase more furniture.

So after all of that, we decided we were going to do nachos for dinner, and promptly headed out to the grocery store to pick up some necessities. I should point out the psychic ability of my beloved, and the fact that we have this quirky little thing where we try and guess the dollar amount going to be spent on the groceries lined up on the conveyor belt. Let me tell you something people: he guessed the exact amount of our grocery purchase. Well... almost. He guessed $196. I guessed $175. The total grocery bill was $196.35 and it freaked not only him out, but my jaw hit the floor and the cashier was also a little bit freaked out. So, that being said, now we have to go check our lotto ticket from Saturday. Who knows, maybe we'll have won something.

The Year of the Dog

2006-01-01T06:54:00.000+10:00

For all those Dogs out there, this is your year. Of course, I have no idea when the Chinese calendar actually starts, but it's your year anyway so revel in it.

I cannot believe it's 2006 now. It took me so long to get the date-writing right (from American to Australian: day/month/year) that I'm now going to get it scooched again for awhile until I remember EVERY DAY that we're now in 2006. My god.

Thank you to everyone who commented on my previous post, and for all the wonderful emails I've been receiving. Your guys are just the best. THE BEST!

So now... to recap because I haven't updated in a few days and I feel like I've been super busy, although by the time I write it all down I'll have realized that I haven't been super busy at all, and wonder how I managed to waste all the time inbetween.

Okokok, so let's see, I left off on the 26th December. Well the 27th wasn't anything spectacular; it was hot though, so I did spend a lot of time trying to keep cool, mostly with the fan blowing directly on me and ringing out wet towels all over my body. Mmmm wet skin under a fan...

The 29th I went down to Mamala's because I had an appointment with my midwife on the 30th at 8:15am. D, after having decided how much he truly hates where he works, rang me up on the 29th (on his way to work) and asked me what I thought about him taking the following day off, so he could come down and listen to the babys heartbeat and be with me for the checkup. Well I all but squealed (or possibly I did squeal) that yes that was a GREAT idea. And so, he called me back a few hours later and told me he'd gotten the time off work and would be joining me for my appointment.

Beyond that, the 29th wasn't that busy. We stayed at the Mall for awhile, trying to keep me cool, plus do a wee bit of grocery shopping, and then headed back to Mamalas. It was remarkably cool at her place and we were both chagrined to see how much my feet had actually swollen (I am not posting pictures, and don't actually HAVE pictures so no asking!) so I sat with my feet up on a cold towel for the remainder of the afternoon. My feet looked like mini submarines, minus the periscope thingy.

That night, the little parasite gave us something to laugh at as she kept moving and rolling around my belly, giving Mamala a chance to really see her acrobatics. Sometimes they were like wave-motions, and other times full on kicks; sometimes even moving and becoming so lopsided that the right side of my stomache was up in the air (mooning us?!) while the left side of my belly was perfectly flat. She's such a darling, my little parasite. We also spent quite awhile reminiscing over my childhood, things I remembered (or not) mostly about my grandparents.

The 30th came along, and D rolled up about 10mins before we had to leave for the hospital, which meant he was up at 5am Q-time (because we're an hour behind NSW in DST). He was terribly excited about hearing the heartbeat for the first time, and I only prayed we'd get the same midwife I had a couple of weeks ago, because so far she's been the only one who's been even remotely interested in finding the actual heartbeat and not the placental swish.

So in we went, waited about fifteen minutes I suppose, in a waiting room FULL of pregnant ladies - did you ever see that episode of the Simpsons where Homer drops Maggie off at playgroup, and when he comes to pick her up one afternoon, there's hundreds of babies everywhere just staring at him? Well that's what the waiting room reminded me of.

And... we were lucky enough to get Sue, the midwife I really wanted us to see! D came in, along with Mamala and my sister Tia. And he got to hear his daughter's heartbeat for the very first time! Of course, it was the first time for my sister as well so she burst into tears, which set off a chain reaction with Mamala and I, but it was very much worth it.

My uterus is measuring about 33cm long, babies heartrate was 154 beats per minute and OMG was she active during the exam!! And she's now out of the breech position and down where she should be. Sue did say that they will keep an eye on that, and even though bubby should stay where she's at right now, she may end up moving around a little and could get herself breech again. Still it's nothing to worry about yet, and Sue was extremely pleased about bub's progress. I might add she was also a little surprised at how active she was! My Nanna seems to think my daughter is going to be quite active and inquisitive - which Mamala concurs with; evidently that's a trait that was borne in me (and in D as well, I might add) so of course we're going to have one active, inquisitive child.

Can't wait!

So this week we're moving right along at 34 weeks and everything looks awesome. Sue says the baby is a nice size, not too big and not too small (as long as she's under 8lbs and over 5lbs I'll be happy) and growing as she should be. This made all of us, particularly D who hasn't been to many of my appointments, very happy. It's one thing for me to tell him what went on, it's something entirely different to hear it from the mouth of the midwife or doctor that everything is going along perfectly.

After our appointment was over, and we'd had breakfast, we drove back to Mamala's to pick up our car to head back into town and into the baby boutique. We wanted to price out carseats and how much it was going to cost to have one installed. Turns out that it's free installation as long as you buy from them, and luckily I found the exact carseat I wanted, for about $160 LESS than where I saw it in the first place!! So we put it on layaway, and will pick it up in a few weeks, along with the pram we have put away as well.

Then we went furniture shopping and found the chest of drawers we want for her room. We didn't pick those up yesterday because they come preassembled and we didn't think we'd have enough room in our car to transport it home. Luckily there's a furniture store closer to where we live, so we will be able to go in, buyt it and have it delivered if we can't fit it in our car.

We have 6 weeks to go before she's here and we've got nothing ready. I'm trying not to panic about it, but I feel like the time is FLYING by and it's all beyond my control. Of course, it's not really, it only feels like it. Or so I'm telling myself.

Anyway, that's the recap of the past few days, which now brings us up to speed, and the dawn of a New Year. We didn't do anything last night except watch a couple of movies: Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me and Hot Shots! before stumbling sleepily into bed around 10pm. We were woken up briefly at midnight by our neighbours counting down the remaining 5 seconds of the old year, and then screaming "Happy New Year!" and dissolving into much merriment and laughter, at which point D and woke up, wished each other a happy new year and then promptly fell back asleep again.

This was disappointing to me because it's the first year in I can't even tell you how many years, that I didn't stay up to watch the ball drop. Of course, this is also the first time in my life that I've been pregnant, and I'm always tired it seems, so I suppose that's my excuse for not being able to stay awake, no matter how much I wanted to.

This morning we had to head out and buy some milk, and while out, stopped at McDonalds for breakfast. It wasn't as good as it usually is, but that might have been because I was really wanting Nutri-Grain cereal and IGA wasn't open and I don't know if they even will be open today (is anything really?) so I had to settle for what was available.

Oh, and yes I have all my Christmas photos on my computer now, I just haven't uploaded them. I know, I'm terrible.

Countdown to 2006

2005-12-29T08:59:00.000+10:00

My god, what a year this has been for me. If someone had told me that I would be worlds different (physically and mentally) than where I was last year, I'd have laughed at them. If someone had told me that in just 7 short weeks I'd be a parent, I would have laughed so hard my lungs would have exploded. If I had been told I would be over-the-moon deliriously happy, I'd have asked for the same drugs they were on.

In short, this past year has literally been THE BEST YEAR OF MY LIFE.

On the 26th of December last year, I broke away from a very unhealthy relationship that had been dragging on for close to 10 years. The last 5 of those years were spent trying to exist day to day without upsetting a very delicate balance in the house I lived in. That "relationship", while tumultuous at best, added up to a collective 5 years as us being an actual couple, while the remaining 5 years saw us as simply roommates - roommates who did not work well together.

We had some good times in those 10 years we shared. Sometimes the "good days" spanned a week or two, but mostly they were just brief glimpses of what should have been.

I tried so hard to make it work, to give him what he wanted, to show him the affection he deserved. At the time I thought maybe something was wrong with me, that I hated men (due to my Father - an entirely different post) and wasn't able to give or receive love freely. As it turns out, that's not quite the case, and it was only because I did not love him, that I could not give him the things he wanted from me.

It was a very hard, bordering on traumatic, breakup; not only because I knew for the remaining month I was there that he would make life very difficult, but because I had shared ten years of my life with this man and despite everything going on inside of me, he was familiar. The whole scenario was familiar. Part of me did not want to let it go and say goodbye; not just because of him, but because I knew I'd be coming back to Australia, and leaving my American life - all of my friends and workmates, and everything that had been my home for so long - behind. I almost couldn't do it.

But I did. And it was only out of one solid friendship from someone who lived in another country, that I managed to hang onto the very last shred of hope I had, the very last piece of strength that was in my body, to actually get up and walk away. He kept me strong, he kept me sane and he kept me focused. Without him, I know I would not have come through it all as well as I did.

"Come and see me before you go," he said. "I'll pay for your flight."

Of course, I didn't let him pay for the flight, but I did go and see him. It was all pre-arranged, our meeting; he was going to pick me up at Toronto International airport, and I'd spend a week with him: a glorious week of having nothing but lots of alcohol and lots of sex. That was the plan. He was going to show me around his amazingly beautiful city, take me out clubbing and dancing and basically try and cram in so many years of fun in one week. We had agreed that because I'd just gotten out of a relationship (at least physically, I'd mentally left it years prior) that nothing else would take place. There would be no talk of deep love or commitment. I wanted time to myself, to reconnect and find myself again.

As it turns out, I was never lost to begin with. I was always there - stifled for so long, but there. And while I flew to Canada for a rather expensive booty-call, things did not turn out quite the way we had intended.

My one week stay turned into three months. He knew within 2 weeks of me being there that he was in love with me, and wanted to marry me. In that 2 week period, I was still mourning the loss of a ten year situation, not ready for anything else, and fighting the feelings I had that were very quickly building up inside of me. I knew he was The One, my eternal love, my soulmate. And the internal fight hastened; It's too soon, You need time to recover, You don't want him being your rebound guy...

As the days progressed, we found more and more that we had so much in common, that we could reach each others minds, that we knew instinctively that this was right. Finally, I gave up the fight with myself, and realized the only reason I was fighting it so much was because of how other people would see it, how they would react, what they would think. And then I distinctly remember thinking, Fuck it. We only live once and I'm going for it. Right or wrong, I'm going for it.

Ladies and gentlemen, I have never looked back. I have never regretted my decision. I have never had the thought of, "Shit, it was far too soon." I've never thought about cheating on him and I've not so much as looked at another guy and thought, "Oh yeah baby, if I were single..."

Come January 28th, D and I will have been together for an entire year, even though we have known each other for going on six years total. He is the love of my life, the light of my life and the strength, hope and courage I hold close to me every single day of my life. While I know I can breathe without him, I don't want to. I cannot begin to describe the overwhelming happiness he brings out in me, or the rich, powerful love he makes me feel.

For the longest time, I questioned my happiness (which some of you will remember), wondering if it was true (because things that often seem too good to be true, usually are?) wondering if I was allowed to be so happy after so many years of unhappiness. I was constantly told "Yes you're allowed to be this happy! You deserve it!" but did I believe that? Not for a long, long time. We both thought we had to be careful lest we "jinx" it. We had both been unhappy for so long, so lonely and sad that neither one of us wanted to do anything or say anything that might ruin what we had.

I should point out that in the first 3 months of my 10 year situation, that man and I had more fights and arguments than D and I have had in an entire year. I was humiliated, privately as well as publicly, and made to feel as insignificant as the rock caught between the treads of your shoe. Although, the rock would have gotten more of a reaction.

D and I have had maybe one real fight, and no more than maybe a small handful of arguments. We know each other so well, we feed off of each other, we know when to back down and give the other some space and room to cool off. That's only one of the hundreds of things I love about him. He knows when to let me be. He doesn't shout at me, or shriek at me, or call me names or humiliate me. He gives me the freedom to be who I am, and he absolutely loves every single cell that makes up my mind and body. He thinks I am perfect, and I think the same of him. We connect.

So, as I sit here now, in my overbearingly hot native homeland of Australia, with my stomache swollen with life who will grace us with her presence in about 7 weeks time, my fiance at work in his airconditioned office, I can look back on this year that I've spent with him and know beyond the shadow of a doubt that I have never in my life been so happy or so in love. And I know it's only going to get better, if that's possible.

Here's to you, my love. May 2006 be as wonderful, if not more, than 2005.

And goodbye to 2005 - thank you for allowing me to have one hell of a ride!

So Much Present-y Goodness!

2005-12-26T19:06:00.000+10:00

I feel like I've done so well this year in the present department, and that's probably because I have. Seriously. D and I set a budget for ourselves this year and vowed we would not go over it. We each had a set dollar amount we could spend on each other and while I thought it was generous (in the beginning), I quickly realized how pitiful it actually was and we both ended up over-spending; him alot moreso than me.

So, without any further ado, I'll rattle off all of my presents (or try to!).

From D
* Microsoft Ergonomic Keyboard (black)
* Teac 21" TV/DVD combo unit
* Revlon Holiday Makeup Kit + Travelling Case
* Russ Plushy Cow
* Russ Plushy Elephant
* Plushy Piglet
* The Simpsons Season 3
* "Simply Bill" recipe book by Bill Granger
* Vodafone v360 cellphone
* Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince
* 3 boxes Lindt Chocolate
* Me, Myself & Irene dvd (which I'm exchanging)
* Black mousepad

From Mamala
* Toy kitty whose stomache goes up and down when batteries are plugged in
* Sterling Silver pink shell necklace
* Sterling Silver blue topaz toe ring

From Brother M
* Hot Shots 1 and 2 dvd

From Brother G
* The Matrix Trilogy dvd

From Tia
* Sterling Silver "Big Sis" pendant
* Sterling Silver Chain
* Me, Myself and Irene dvd

I know I'm probably forgetting stuff, but that's really all I can remember at this point. It's amazing I managed to remember that much, honestly. These days my brain is getting more and more shot (love you little parasite) which I think might also have something to do with the heat.

It's so stinking hot today, as it was yesterday but at least we had a little bit of cool breeze coming off the ocean at Mamala's. Here we don't have that luxury, but we do have a fan I've been parked in front of since we've come home, which has helped immensely. Well, that and the fact that the new TV came with a remote control so I don't have to get up and down off the couch anymore to change channels!! I didn't realize how much I missed having a tv remote (which I know sounds really sad and pathetic) until I didn't have one anymore but now do again.

Also, my throat is still wicked sore, and I'm still coughing, though not as much, and if it's not gone by Friday then when I go in to chat with my midwife, I'll see if she can do anything for me. It just seems too unusual to have a sore throat and chesty cough for almost 3 weeks now, though I understand something is going around...

And also I found out on the Friday just gone that my darling little parasite has the hiccups. I'd noticed this funky little pulsing movement before, but had no idea what the hell it was, until Mamala had her hand on my lower stomache, felt them for a bit and promptly told me that yes, indeed those are hiccups.

Since then, she's been hiccuping alot. Does that mean I need to drink more water? Or hold my breath more?

* * MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! * *

2005-12-25T06:40:00.000+10:00

Merry Christmas everyone!! I hope all of you got what you wanted, and even more that you want what you've got.

I'm off to Mamala's for the day, and possibly until Boxing Day tomorrow, depending on the amount of alcohol that's consumed (by D, not me so much) but I'll be sure to come back and rattle off everything I scored this year.

Hope you all eat until bursting, sleep for abit, and then come back and eat some more!! Have a FANTASTIC DAY!!!!

'Twas the Night Before Christmas and all Through the House...

2005-12-24T18:45:00.000+10:00

...All you can hear is me coughing, mixed with the sounds radiating from D's laptop. Even though we had our biweekly checkup at the Dr. yesterday, I mentioned my sore throat to him but failed to mention my deep, raspy, lung-expelling cough and as a result, have been coughing to no end and suffering with a sore, dry and itchy throat. At least he did look at my throat, but proclaimed nothing wrong with me, and sent me toddling about my way.

The baby is doing wonderfully. My uterus is about 33cm long now, and he listened to the heartbeat once again, although I only heard the placental swish. He's not nearly as thorough as my midwife, and I'm of two minds about this. On one hand, he probably knows what he's doing, being that he has two girls of his own, so he probably feels he doesn't need to be as thorough as my midwives, but on the other hand I feel like maybe he should be just a tad more interested. At least pretend, anyway.

We did end up speaking about my due date, though. The ladies at the hospital are more inclined to go with the EDD brought forth from my last period, which puts me at February 11th for delivery, instead of going with the ultrasound date of February 21st. Right in the beginning I thought this would be the best option anyway, going by the last period date, since that's just normally how things are calculated, but my Dr. thought that we should use the ultrasound date because evidently that was more accurate.

With that in mind, it has seemed all throughout my pregnancy that I've been "a little ahead of schedule" if we were going to stick with February 21st. It seems that my uterus size is right on target for a child due on February 11th, thus no longer making me "a little ahead of schedule" but "right on time".

Well, duh.

I don't mean to tell you how to do your job, Doc, but feel free to listen to me next time when I say, "Yes my period dates are accurate, yes I'm sure that was the first day of the last one, and no, I have no idea why I would have 2 false negative home pregnancy tests."

Anyway. It's the night before Christmas, and both D and I are terribly excited about it. We're going down to Mamalas early, and my older brother is making his famous waffles for breakfast (good god they're soooooo yummy) and we have enough food to literally drown (or suffocate) a small village. I can't wait! And yes, I'm terribly excited about opening up my presents, since D finished up his shopping for me yesterday and now almost all of his presents are sitting happily under the tree, thereby making it looking alot more full and rather festive. Part of me wants to tear into them now and rip them open, but a bigger part of me (more of the child part of me) is restraining the adult part of me with a huge amount of excitement and glee and general Christmas Spirit.

You can wait one more sleep, e!

Dreaming of ... Spiders Feasting?

2005-12-22T06:58:00.000+10:00

I think I've decided that it's just because I'm pregnant that I'm having such weird dreams lately.

Again I woke up this morning after living through some freak thing in my head, but this time it mostly had things to do with makeup and the lack thereof, and how I couldn't get this one particular foundation I wanted (it was so light and smooth it felt like you were wearing nothing at all), and for some ungodly reason I had to go into some dressing room (read: a vertical box with a curtain over it) and get undressed to put this makeup on, but it was so worth it, except by the time I'd done all that and realized I wanted this foundation and lots of it, there was none left and the girl at the store had no idea when they'd be getting more in.

I have no idea what type of store it was either. All the makeup I was looking through were in handbags that were placed neatly on rows of shelves that were staggered throughout the store. Some things were left by themselves on the shelves, things like lotions and perfumes and such, but mostly all of the makeup was inside handbags, and only specific handbags at that.

I was looking through a particularly pink handbag, trying to find the foundation I so desperately wanted, when Mamala moseyed by and thrust a tube of something at me.

"Here," she says. "Try that."

It wasn't even foundation and I didn't want to try it, but I took it anyway and glanced skeptically at the tube, reading. I think I might have been reading ingredients or "How to Use" instructions, I'm not sure. But I do know that whatever it was I was holding, I wasn't interested in using. Quite possibly it was face moisturizer that was tinted since I recall the tube itself actually looked like the colour of the foundation I wanted.

So, I woke up and toddled off to the loo and as I came back to crawl back into bed beside my softly sleeping Canadian, I realized there was a brownish lump on my otherwise steel-grey carpet. I cocked my head and looked at it, curiously I might add, while squinting, trying to determine what this brownish lump actually was. It didn't seem to be moving all that well, and in the near darkness of the room (it was roughly 430am, and the sun was just beginning to bank) I couldn't tell what the hell it was.

"What are you doing babes?" came the muffled mumble of a sleepy man.

"There's something on the carpet," I said. "I don't know what it is."

"Let's see," he says, fully awake now, and comes around to my side, squats down, squints for a few minutes. Then he stands up and proclaims, "It's a spider."

"A spider?"

"Yeah. I'll get the mortein," he says and wanders out into the kitchen.

Meanwhile, I'm still sitting on the side of the bed (in just my unders because it was so freaking hot last night) still squinting and trying to see what the hell this brownish blob actually was. It wasn't that I disbelieved him, it was more like I wanted to see for myself what it was.

"What kind of spider do you think it is?" he asks, walking back into the room, the dawning sunlight dancing across his rippling shoulder muscles.

"I donno," I said. "I can't even see it." Squint, squint, squint. (Somehow I always think that squinting is going to actually HELP me see better but really, it doesn't, unless you're looking directly at the sun) "Turn on the light?"

Quietly and still wielding his can of mortein, he walks over to the wall and flips the light, (I squint some more) and meanders back, crouching down.

"Hmm," I murmur. "Looks like a Huntsman."

"Does it?"

"Yeah a little."

"Sorry spider," he says, preparing to spray.

"What's it doing?" I ask.

"Um," he pauses. "Looks like it's eating."

"Eating what?"

"A cockroach I think. Or maybe a grasshopper."

"Get your camera."

In hindsight, I think spraying this spider during a feed was probably the wrong thing to do. Somehow, now looking back on it, it seems a cruel and unusual punishment for a little being who was just hungry enough to come down off the wall or ceiling and feast on my bedroom carpet. I'm really sorry Charlotte.

It turns out that Charlotte had been feasting a moth, for which I now feel even worse over making D kill her. (Though in my defense, I didn't make him kill her, he volunteered) We've been having quite a moth problem for the last month or so, and we've yet to figure out a way to stop them coming back. Well. After this morning's little effort, I think I now know the way to stop them coming back... Only if we can manage to stop killing them.

The Icecream Man

2005-12-21T12:52:00.000+10:00

Sounds abit foreboding, doesn't it? Like something Stephen King would write about, kind of like The Library Cops. Twisted story, that one.

Anyway, the icecream man just drove by in his little truck, playing his very warped music. Part of me wishes I'd run out there and bought up his stock, with all the cash I have on me, because I'm so very hot today. But you see, the more practical side of me is ever so glad I didn't, because really, who spends $70 on icecream?

* * Merry Christmas * *

2005-12-21T09:28:00.000+10:00

I'm in the mood to be merry, so merry I shall be! It's a gorgeous day today, though already too warm for me and it's only going to get warmer, and probably to the overly-uncomfortable level. But we only have FOUR sleeps until Christmas Day and I am too excited about it.

It's my first Christmas with D, and I can't wait to wake up next to him and plant kisses all over his face and give him huge hugs and whisper how much I love him before we dive out of bed (not that I will be doing too much diving, you understand) and race into the lounge room (not that I will actually race, mind you) to unwrap our presents. I almost feel like a kid again and I'm LOVING it. If this is how I feel now, I can only imagine what it's going to be like when we have the baby next year, because by then she'll be about 10 months old. Good god, I'm going to have to really curb my spending next year - I can already foresee buying a whole bunch of things she won't even want.

But I digress. It's Christmas time, and I'm with everyone I love deeply and I'm back home and there's just NOTHING better than this! So, Merry Christmas and a Happy Hannukah and for those of you with bizarre religious beliefs or celebrate some other weird and wonderful holiday this December, make it a GREAT one!

Dreaming in Colour

2005-12-20T07:53:00.000+10:00

I had a couple of odd dreams last night and early this morning. I also had a weird one the night before last, which involved a guy who was gay (and he was seriously very good looking) and I making out, and at some point I ended up grabbing hold of his ass just to feel it. It left me feeling... Unusual.

My first dream last night starred myself, my child (who was born a girl but became a boy), my Mamala and a bunch of other people I don't know. So it started off in the hospital, and I was there to actual birth the parasite... And there was absolutely no pain. None at all. Someone said to me that I was 8cm dialated and I should be feeling pain, but there wasn't any, and I was walking around and talking (and wearing a green tracksuit) like nothing was going on. Fade to black for about 2 seconds, and then merge from blackness to me being in the hospital bed, holding the baby and breastfeeding her a little bit.

Cut to a few months down the track now, and we're out and about somewhere, with Mamala I think but I'm not sure, and suddenly my baby isn't a girl anymore, but a fat little boy with a huge chin, huge forehead and button nose. He was really quite the ugliest thing I'd ever seen in my life, and all I kept thinking was This can't be my child, he's so ugly. Who on D's side of the family has such a big chin and forehead?? I couldn't figure it out.

But he was hungry, my boy, and there was nowhere for me to sit down because at this point we were outside on a hill, with a parking garage behind us that was completely full up, but there was some guy outside working on a red car and I needed to get home because someone had left me there promising me I'd get a ride with the guy fixing the car. That just wasn't the case. So, I'm wandering around wondering how I'm going to feed my son because I'd forgotten to wear a nursing bra that day, and also there was nowhere for me to sit down so I kept thinking, You can't breastfeed standing up! But then, due to his cries and wriggles and he was very heavy for a child of only a couple of months old (he was rather chubby actually) I lifted up my shirt and pulled up my bra and let him have at it. The funny thing was, he didn't drink for very long before he was done, and I remember thinking, I'm supposed to be leaking. They all told me when he was hungry I'd start leaking. How come I'm not leaking? So then, thinking that maybe I just didn't have enough milk in that side, I shifted him over to the other side and he drank for about a minute and was done. It never occurred to me that he shouldn't be so chubby if that's all he drank.

So, at that point, after the feeding, I called up Mamala on her cell, and I think she said she lived about ten minutes away and I was in tears when I asked her to come pick us up. She hemmed and hawed for a few minutes because she'd just gotten home from being out, and had just put her car in the garage but finally relented and said she'd be there in a few minutes to pick us up and drive us home.

I feel like I'm leaving so much of the dream out but I can only really remember it in bits and pieces. It's all very weird and unusual and I think even D was in the dream at various points, as well as my cousin Melissa.

* * * * *

The second dream I had involved me being at work at the ISP I once worked for back in Connecticut, USA. Almost all of the original people were there that I knew but the building had changed somewhat and in some cases, was entirely empty.

I was running around the building laughing, as though someone was chasing me even though nobody was. I ended up running through one side of the building to the other, looking for someone (I'll call him Leo) because I always spent time with him when I could. [I'll need to elaborate on that at some point, this dream often mixes reality within it and I'm not going to explain it here right now] I ended up running into a large room where a bunch of other coworkers were, and I asked, Have you guys seen Leo? At that moment he wandered in, looking exactly as I remembered him with one notable difference: He had long hair that was tied back into a ponytail and for some odd reason, that really suited him. (He usually wore his hair in a tight cut to his head, military style that was very, very hot)

He gave me a really big grin, as though he was over the moon to see me (we haven't spoken to one another in oh, probably three-four years or so now I guess) and we instantly started chatting and laughing the way we'd done when we were together. From there we were suddenly in "combat" and he was leading the pack of us, though I'm not really sure how many of 'us' there were. I do know there was a few of us, maybe 6 but maybe more, I don't really know, and I was holding some kind of plasma ray gun thingy. {It was very cool} We were stealth walking up some corridor which led out onto a wooden verandah type thing, and there were these almost invisible droppings falling from the sky; well I opened fire with my plasma gun thingy, holding down the trigger like you would hold it down on a machine gun, and just sprayed the general area in front of me.

Suddenly Leo shouts at me, telling me to open fire, to which I shout back that I am but they're not dying! They just keep coming and coming! And the once invisible things dropping from the sky are now coated in pink plasma that came from my gun, and I'm wondering why it turned pink when the lasers from my gun were clearly invisible. I think at that point I realized my gun was a dud...

...And I woke up. It was really, really odd. Wish I had a dream interpreter! Not that it matters, I suppose. I've read that pregnant ladies often have weird and wonderful dreams - but this is only the second time in 32 weeks that I've had dreams this bizarre.

Ah EverQuest, You Vile Temptress

2005-12-19T06:28:00.000+10:00

"We've Reactivated Your Closed Everquest Account" is the headline I see when I open up my mailbox. Thinking it must be some kind of hoax, I read through it and find out that it is sincere, and that Sony (obviously in the Christmas Spirit) has decided to reactivate my EverQuest account for 21 days! Yes, that's right, 21 days. They couldn't quite make it 30 though, could they? That would be just too much to hope for given the FIVE years of loyalty I so willingly gave them.

That aside, I have multiple EverQuest accounts, so... Which one are they reactivating? Do I dare log in again only to find that it's the wrong account I've logged into, thereby charging up D's creditcard (cause I won't use mine, you see) for a month wherein I'll hardly play? Oh, but it's tempting! Yes, yes it is! If D ever went back to play, I'd be right there with him, you'd better believe it. That's highly unlikely though; he refuses to give money to Sony in whatever form, after they screwed him out of so much (via EverQuest) for 5 years. He's got a point there.

But, I truly do still miss the game. It's horrible. I no longer know anyone who plays regularly, and the companionship ingame is probably what I miss more than anything else. Though I really really miss my little Gnome ShadowKnight too.

Dear god, I'm reminiscing over a game. If that doesn't prove how much of a gamer I am, very little will.

Another Long Post Where I Squish Lots of Information In

2005-12-18T07:32:00.000+10:00

Remember my sore throat I was complaining about? And my sore ear? And how it hurt when I swallowed and my teeth hurt due to the pressure in my sinuses? And then how I had to go to the Doctor and get some amoxicillan?

Well the sore throat is back. The coughing is back. The hurty-when-I-swallow is back. No earaches yet though, and no sinus pressure. I go back to the Doctor on Friday, and I'm not terribly sure what's going to be able to get done. Ideally I'd like a throat transplant - have those ever been successful? - and I'd rather not take any more drugs if I can help it. I'm pretty sure my Doctor wouldn't give me anything that would harm the baby, but then you never really can tell, can you? I'd just rather not take them if I can help it.

And in other baby-related news... Has anyone ever had a sore bellybutton during pregnancy? It's an odd sensation, and maybe has alot to do with the fact that I keep playing with it, but it just feels like it's poking into me from the inside. Or that something is poking into me from the inside. Yes, yes I'm sure it's the baby on more than one occasion, but sometimes it feels harder and more harsh than that. I don't know how to describe it. Almost like a cramp, I guess, when I lean forward and put pressure there.

So we're 32 weeks this week, and feeling more and more uncomfortable as the days go by. I wish I could just find a sitting position that was as comfortable as my laying positions. That's just not meant to be though, is it? And as the time draws near, I'll be even less comfortable then. It's all worth it though, as I lay on my bed and stare down at my little mountain and watch the alien beneath squirm and wriggle and do backflips and dips and somersaults. Honestly I can't tell you how COOL that looks, to actually see her physically moving around in there. I sometimes half wish that I had a transparent stomache.

D stayed home from work on Friday, and so he went Christmas shopping for me (Yay, so excited!!!) but I went along with him and we split up during the whole actual shopping process. I ended up purchasing him a couple more items while I was out (now really going over alotted budget) and sitting down for the rest of the time. Saturday we went out again because he wanted to pick up a few more items that weren't at the shopping center on Friday, so we went down the coast to an entirely different mall (Pacific Fair for those in the general area) where, by the time we arrived, I was literally drenched in sweat because it was so damned hot and we have no aircon in the car. The thing about this mall is that it's an indoor/outdoor mall, so unless you park undercover near Myers, then you'll be walking in the hot sun to get to the airconditioned part of the Mall. Which is what we did. And then I promptly found a chair, sat my ass down and waited for D to get his shopping done.

Only he didn't get it done at all. He was wondering around pricing items and looking for specific things and felt really bad that all I was doing was sitting on a bench inside waiting for him, and we ended up leaving, amidst my protests that he should stay and get the shopping done. He kept telling me, "No, I'll do it through the week on lunch." and things of that nature. I'm wondering if that's because some of the items he wants to buy me are so big that he couldn't possibly hide them from me while I'm with him. Since I like that vision so much, I'm going to stick with it and assume that's the real reason.

Also, it turns out I don't like Dory. We had fish'n chips at Mamala's last night, and I got some crumbed calamari and some chips, which were so yummeh, and because I wasn't sure what fish to buy, Mamala suggested Dory. It's really not that delicious in my opinion, so now I'll have to try a different fish the next time we eat that way. At least now I know, though.

We also picked up a turkey yesterday, though we didn't buy any stuffing mix or cranberry sauce yet. The turkey looks big enough, and I'm really hoping it's going to be. Mostly we'll end up having a cold platter, I think - the turkey, Mamala bought a ham, and she's buying a couple of chickens as well - and some prawns, plus all the salads we can eat. It should be awesome, and my brother is making his famous waffles on Christmas Morning for us all to enjoy. Just hearing about all this food really makes me wish I was still in my second trimester because I ate like a freaking FIEND and enjoyed every bit of it.

Now I can't eat nearly as much and it's not nearly as much fun anymore!

God I'm so excited about Christmas this year. I'm with my ultra fantastic, sweet, thoughtful, kind, considerate, extremely hot fiance, and I'm back home in Australia with my family where I've wanted to be for so many years now, AND in almost 8 short weeks, we'll have our wriggling, squirming, screaming bundle of joy here with us.

Best.Year.Ever.

Amalgamation

2005-12-14T07:05:00.000+10:00

So it turns out the neighbours across the street aren't back afterall. It turns out they only came back for an afternoon to finish cleaning and mowing the lawn and deweeding the garden. The house is still quite empty.

The house to the left right of us finally sold, and so now we have new neighbours moving in there. They're as trashy as the neighbours to our left, I'm sad to say, though at least so far nobody from that vicinity has kicked a ball into our back yard. I'm still waiting on that, though.

Okay so I was gone for two days - I headed back down the coast on Sunday afternoon/evening to Mamala's House because I had my hospital appointment yesterday and we just figured it would be easier if I stayed over Sunday and Monday nights. That way, I could do D's Christams shopping on Monday without him bothering me about it. (He's terribly excited about the whole gift giving/receiving prospect this year) Of course, since he reads the site, I can't tell you what I got him.

I got everything I wanted to get for him, and went over our alotted budget by about $60. Of course he automatically thinks this now means he can run out and use the creditcard on spending for me, but after many emphatic No! comments, I think he will now refrain from that. My Canadian; he's such a kidder.

And in other Christmas-related news, we got our tree up and decorated last night. Now it's perfectly complete in all of it's purple and silver glory. It just looks awesome. Photos will come once I get them off my computer.

We're having our place inspected today by the realtors. I guess they come in every 3-4 months to make sure we're not ripping down walls and blowing up rooms and digging trenches in the backyard incase of charlie. (I know how we all fear that) For the last two days, D and my brother have gotten the place looking sparkling clean and in tiptop shape for it, and with the exception of last night's dinner (which I will clean up this morning) it still looks all fantastic and neat and tidy. I love when my house looks like this. Even the giant spacious tiled floors are mopped!

So like I mentioned earlier, I had my antenatal appointment yesterday at the Hospital and it went so well. For the longest time Mamala and I had thought we'd been hearing the baby's heartbeat but as it turns out, we'd only ever been hearing the placental swish. (This sounds like a helicopter taking off, minus the engine noise - the swish swish of the propellers) The first midwife I ever saw didn't bother correcting us on what we were hearing, and my very own Doctor didn't bother correcting us either. They both just let us assume the swishing sound was the baby's actual heartbeat. Not so true: The heartbeat, which we really did hear for real yesterday sounds more like a really fast paced tennis match, the sound you hear when the ball is being hit with the racket. It was so incredible to hear!

Her heartrate is at a very healthy, strong 148 beats per minute, she weighs approximately 4lbs right now, and is currently happily hanging out on the right side of my uterus in the breech position. The midwife I saw yesterday repeatedly told me not to worry about that, that the baby still has 6 weeks or so to turn herself and get her head down where it needs to be. I think I did tell her I wasn't worrying about it but she kept stressing that point anyway. She did say though, that if bubs hasn't turned by the point I'm in labour, they will do a ceasarian, but again she told me not to worry. Honestly, I really wasn't worrying about it. If she turns, she turns and if she doesn't, she doesn't; there's not much I can do about it. She'll be born however she wants to be.

I also ended up signing the forms stating she was to have her Vitamin K shot at birth, but that I am denying the HepB shots. In my opinion, that's not even remotely necessary and I'm not going to have it done. I'm probably not going to have it done within her first year either. Of course, I had to write on the form why I wasn't having her HepB shot, so I wrote, "I think it's silly." And I do.

So that's the recap of my last couple of days, eventful as they were. Today I'm not doing much, if anything at all, though shortly I'm going to have to go have a shower and get ready for the realtor to show up. Beyond that, I might just bum around reading and keeping cool and keeping my poor feetsies elevated. Alternatively, I can jump on WoW and level up my little cow warrior.

Storm inc, Buckle Down the House

2005-12-09T07:52:00.000+10:00

Last night the sky turned green and ominous, and as thunder rumbled through the streets and lightning flashed evilly through the skies, I wondered just how big a golf ball really was, and whether or not I'd really get to see "golf ball sized hail". Of course, I didn't.

Living where we live, the hail always goes around us. We got some rain and some minor wind - minor in that the roof stayed put, but windy enough that my back patio screen doors flew wide open - and some more rain. In fact, the rain was coming down in sheets at one point, so then we had to run around and close windows.

Now, you must understand, at this point I was already hot and bothered and terribly uncomfortable.

(And as a digression, do you remember when you were a kid and people would say to you, "When I was your age..." and you always swore never to say that, but then ten years down the track you actually catch yourself saying it and think "Oh crap I just became THOSE people." Well I'm like that with my pregnancy. "When I was pregnant..." or "Because I'm pregnant..." or "Since I'm pregnant...." Well, you get the idea)

Being pregnant (haha!) I'm feeling the heat more and more than I would if I were a normal, prepregnancy human. So, being that yesterday was ALREADY hot and uncomfortable for me, regardless of how I tried cooling down, when we had to run around and close windows to prevent some floodage, it obviously became infinitely WARMER. And as a result, more unhappiness ensued.

Thankfully the storm passed within half an hour or so, and we were able to open up the windows again and breathe in the fresh scent of rained-on grass and asphalt. God it was good.

Oh, and in other news, it seems our neighbours across the street are back. I'm now wondering what exactly they were moving all of that furniture for, including beds and sheets and linens and towels etc., when they clearly weren't moving out at all? Sometimes I wish I was much much nosier.

It's Going to be a Scorcher Again Today, Folks! (35C and no Breezes)

2005-12-08T07:27:00.000+10:00

I'm feeling alot more human today, thank god. I didn't wake up having coughing fits for most of last night, and this morning I've only had very minor coughing fits. It's been good.

Last night was a bear though - so hot and I was so uncomfortable. Once again, D and I found ourselves on the topic of purchasing an airconditioner, one that we're apparently going to look at this weekend somewhere, and if we can, layby it. I would like to scream WOOHOO at this, but mostly I'm going to remain quiet because I don't know if we'll actually GET AROUND to looking at airconditioners. He was more interested in telling me about the great Christmas decos at Myer and how the store near work is much better than the one in the Mall we usually frequent, and we should really go there this weekend to finish up the tree decorations.

God I love him.

In other news, it seems the neighbours across the street have moved out. While watching reruns of the Simpsons and Futurama last night, my brother and I watched as they piled all their things into a big Thrifty truck, 2 white cars, a truck with trailer behind it, and a small silver car. Shortly thereafter, they were gone and not to be seen since.

The question here, is why? My brother likes to think there was something wrong with the foundation and the house isn't structurally sound. On the other hand, he muses, it could very well be because too many people have complained about their Rotti jumping up on the fence, and hanging over said fence, in an attempt to eat whatever passersby happen to be...er, passing by at that moment.

Myself? I prefer to think they murdered someone on their lot, buried them in the backyard and are now immigrating to Mexico where they can't be extradited.

** edit: It's now 2:45pm and it's not nearly as hot as 35C. It's about 4 degrees cooler. In the shade. Which still makes it uncomfortably warm. At least for me. And for the construction guys across the road who felt the same way since they packed up and went home ages ago. Think I might go stand under a cold shower.

Browser Snob

2005-12-07T08:47:00.000+10:00

Just wanted to point out for all my new readers (and boy it looks like there's a lot of you -- welcome!) that, in case you haven't noticed, the site looks like shit and doesn't render correctly in IE. I will tell you now that I absolutely HATE IE and will make no attempt to change the site layout so it does render correctly.

And you know you should be using Firefox anyway. ;)

A Feeling of Permenance

2005-12-07T07:42:00.000+10:00

Still feeling crappy but not as crappy as I've been feeling. Slightly less crappy might be the technical term for it.

Was up again all last night, coughing up pieces of lung and keeping my soon-to-be-hubby awake, even though he was still a good sport and didn't make mention of it. Nor did he grumble and swear at me when I kept getting up to go potty, or to try and blow my nose. He's such a sweetheart.

And I must give him loads of love: he took his QLD drivers test yesterday and passed! With flying colours no less! I'm so happy for him, so proud of him! I had no idea he was even going to be taking it because he hadn't said anything. So then he also took his motorcycle license test and passed that too. I'm sure had he gone for his CDL, he would have passed it as well.

He's so psyched though and now feels a little more permenant. I know this is a good thing for him - for both of us, really. After all, like my brother pointed out last night:

Now you'll be able to get into strip clubs.

My Kingdom for an Airconditioner

2005-12-06T08:15:00.000+10:00

My weekend was fruitful. Saturday we spent at the large ass mall close to where we live, and thank god we were there because it was so hot and the aircon was SO nice. We finished purchasing christmas gifts and came home, stopping at two of the pet shops to drool over the freaky little kittens who were playing and pouncing on each other. God how I wanted to take them home!

Sunday we headed out again, down the coast to Mamala's place, stopping at yet another mall to check out some rugs that were on sale, and to bask in the airconditioned goodness. Yes I really do miss airconditioning - I was so spoiled living in the states and Canada. Sigh. Anyway, we get to Mamala's and it's still fairly cool out, but of course I'm feeling miserable because of my cold/sinus thing.

Monday rolls around and we head down to the Doctors for me to have my 30wk check up. Let me tell you how wonderful it was to sit in the almost frosty waiting room, the lung hacking notwithstanding. We listened to the babys heartbeat, I got a referral to have a 3D ultrasound done in town (which I have yet to book) and then drove back home to pick up my sister and take her into work. Oh, and my Dr. determined I have a sinus infection and prescribed me some Amoxicillan. Yum. So now I'm taking that.

I can't even describe to you how hot yesterday was. It was even worse up at my place, because not being right on the water means no cool ocean breezes. Instead it was very dry, very humid and pushing about 37C (almost 100F). Oh, and no breeze to speak of. Last night was infinitely worse, but I did pull out the freestanding fan and put it in the bedroom, proceeded to have an almost-cold shower for about 20 mins and then lay down on the bed and read for about an hour before I finally fell asleep.

I didn't sleep well, but I didn't sleep badly either. Tossed and turned through the night and kept waking up with bouts of coughing fits. I think I woke D up every single time I went into these fitful spasms but he took it with utmost joy and love and this morning proclaimed me "very sexy" and proceeded to tell me just how much he loved me. (Honestly it must be love if he can look at me with puppy-dog adoring eyes while I'm dying of heat and stuffy nosedness and coughs that would make one think I needed to be in an iron lung)

Today I plan on doing very little, and probably spending most of the day in and out of a very cool shower, and in front of the fan. I may even nap alot today since it's going to be at least as hot as it was yesterday and I have no way of getting to the nearest mall for the airconditioning.

Let's hope we can find a smallish window sized one for the bedroom soon.

This is Where I Yank Out My Teeth, Like in That Stephen King Movie

2005-12-03T07:55:00.000+10:00

I hate sinus pressure so much, and even more so when it's only on ONE side of my face. Still the left side, and it's aching so badly my teeth are killing me. I wanted to skewer a toothpick up into my gum to relieve the pressure but I haven't managed to do that yet. Think I'm going to just go the old standby route and take more paracetamol.

Before I ended up going to bed last night, I had D drop the CS into my ears again, and I put it up my nose, but I also ended up making up a warm salt drink and gargled that for a few minutes. Dear christ it was awful, but it seemed to have really helped. My throat is not anywhere near AS sore as it was yesterday... However, as I lay down last night, I applied Vicks to my throat (I read that you should rub it on your throat if it's sore) and now whatever it was in my head, seems to have plummeted straight to my chest. Awesome.

Now I just sound like I'm permanently trying to cough up a lung. FANtastic.

4D Ultrasound Images

2005-12-02T12:56:00.000+10:00

Well if you live in Sydney or Melbourne (um, and are pregnant), I urge you to check into Early Image. They do 4D scans of your baby AND give you a copy AND put it on DVD or VHS for you! I did email them to see if they knew of anyplace that does this up in Brisbane or the Gold Coast area, but unfortunately they do not, and apparently they're the only company Australia-wide that specializes in these types of scans. (This is what they told me, anyway) They also said they're looking to open up an office in Brisbane next year so with some luck I'll have my next pregnancy well documented!!

Who's the Goose? Heh... Me!

2005-12-02T08:21:00.000+10:00

Guess who jinxed herself completely by saying she was all better? Yeah yeah, I did. I was so fine yesterday too, but this morning? Oh god this morning, wicked sore throat, stuffed up nose and an earache that pitched down into my teeth. Only on my left side though. My whole left side felt like it was swollen so of course, I ambled out of bed and took some paracetamol, and ambled back to bed. I've taken more CS this morning (gargled, nose, ears) and my throat isn't as sore but it feels like maybe my tonsils are a little swollen. Wish I could see back there.

We had one hell of a storm last night. Thunder doesn't generally wake me up but it did very early this morning, I can tell you. I was jolted awake by a deep rolling booming sound that felt like it was right ontop of my roof, and for a moment I wondered if someone was actually up there. Then I realized it was just Zeus and ambled out of bed to check and make sure all the front windows were closed. They were, and I ambled back to bed again.

My dreams were very odd, to say the least. I know I don't remember them, or all of them anyway - one of them had to do with me making tea and ringing out the teabag before I threw it away. Another dream saw me playing EverQuest again but also failing horribly at it because I haven't played it in over a year. I know I had a couple more besides those two, and just can't put my finger on them.

Hope you guys are feeling better than I am today; I absolutely hate Summer colds.

First Day of Summer

2005-12-01T08:57:00.000+10:00

It is you know. Today marks the first day of Summer, and I'm not sure if I'm happy or not. Part of me is, because this means really lovely hot weather, and in ordinary circumstances I would not complain about it, but... Well you know. But since being pregnant, blah blah blah. So, yeah, not sure if I'm happy or not that we're now officially into Summer.

In other news, I had the beginnings of a headcold on Tuesday. It just walked up and bitch slapped me in the side of the head, with no warning whatsoever. Nose was stuffy, throat was dry, sore and scratchy, and I just felt miserable. I wasn't going to let it get to me though, so that afternoon I ended gargling some Colloidal Silver and squirting some up the schnoz and in the ears. Did this for a couple of days, a few times a day and today I'm normal again, no stuffy nose, no sore throat, no aches or anything. God I love this stuff.

MiL rang last night, and I'm ashamed to admit I was rather nasty toward my love once he got off the phone. There was really no need to be, either. I didn't apologize to him - I was thinking that perhaps I should do so tonight when he gets home from work. I know why I was nasty, though I'm not sure I'm going to tell him why. I think maybe I'll just apologize and leave it at that.

Divorce Cometh, and 5 Signs You've Met Your Perfect Match

2005-11-29T16:21:00.000+10:00

Catchy title eh?

Found this article about your perfect match on msn.com and read it. As I began reading it, I started grinning and grinning and then giggling. D and I are this to a T. And from the examples given, at least now I know we're not weird at all; we're just in love.

Also, I just read that Nick and Jessica split! Can't say I didn't see it coming, but now this leaves Ms. Simpson all out in the open (no pun intended). For those of you who remember all my freaky Jessica dreams, you can bet I'm seriously now considering tracking her down.

For... you know, conversation. Yeeeeees.

Pregnancy Myths

2005-11-28T15:51:00.000+10:00

via iVillage.com

This information certainly alleviated some of the thoughts I had - particularly about sleeping on my back AND the whole deal with having an episiotomy. I wonder if I can actually request not having one of those on my birth plan?

28 Sleeps 'til Christmas!

2005-11-27T07:11:00.000+10:00

Yesterday was an absolutley amazing day. It started out with a leisurely sleep-in time of about 7am after which we got up - D played WoW for 3 hours and I played Sims2 - before we headed out to begin our Christmas shopping. This was for both presents AND christmas decos.

Since this is our first year together, we put a great deal of effort into deciding what colours to use, how we were going to do it, what colour lights (if coloured at all) to string; all the usual questions one asks when one is about do a tree. And you know what? I'm excited this year, which I think has nothing to do with my impending mommyhood, but more of the fact that I'm totally enjoying myself this year. I'm at home, in my own country, surrounded by my own family and life IS GREAT. I'm finding that, unlike previous years, this Christmas is actually fun for me. I LOVED going out yesterday with my love, and buying presents and deciding what to buy for the tree and did we want to get table decorations too? (so much to consider!) Oh and did you know that you can't buy the little baubles that have hooks on them anymore? (At least up here) I knew; I just forgot so I didn't buy any hooks so we couldn't put the tree up last night. (It's probably just as well, it's abit early isn't it?)

Even Friday was an awesome day - my Mamala and my sister came up for the afternoon and we went out shopping; originally to go grocery shopping (which we did do) but we also ended up in Salvos where I picked up some more baby clothes and a baby bouncer-seat thing. (How descriptive was that!?) Mamala also brought up my changing table for me, and it actually looks really good as-is, only it doesn't go with anything so it's gotta be rubbed back and repainted white.

Today we're not quite done and still have some things to do, so we're heading down the coast to look at some rugs that are on sale, as well as look at some fitness equipment. We both want an oscillating machine (god knows I'll need one after the baby is born) and a bench with some weights.

It's pissing down rain at the moment which is just irritating me because when D did our laundry yesterday, he set the machine and we left the house; when we got home last night neither of us put it out so now it's reeking of dampness and mustiness so it needs to be rewashed (along with the second load of stuff waiting to be done) and because it's raining, I can't go hang it on the line. (No dryer)

Anyway, must get ready to head out and go wake up my sleeping Canadian.

A Sense of Loss

2005-11-25T08:14:00.001+10:00

Happy BELATED Turkey Day everyone!

I can't tell you how much I really am missing this holiday this year. I don't know whether it's just the yummilicious food (and god there's always so much isn't there?!) or the company or the weather, or a combination of all three. Or maybe it's the fact that as soon as today is over with, everything Christmas comes out and soon it'll be snowing and beyond that, MORE festivities which will include so.much.food!

Anyway, I hope everyone celebrating has a wonderful day and evening, and go mad stuffing yourselves with all that incredibly, deliciously mouthwatering food. I'm wishing I was right there with you!

Australia Isn't THAT Rough.

2005-11-24T08:19:00.000+10:00

D and I woke up late this morning; late as in almost 7am. He generally leaves the house to go to work between 7am-7:20am, so being that we woke up late, he left late and so will probably arrive at work a little late. I should probably care about that but I don't. I wanted him to stay home today.

Mamala gave me a call yesterday morning, saying something about being at the Salvos and did I want a cheap changing table? I grilled her about it: Is it in good nick? Are there any scratches or dents? What colour is it? Is it tall enough for me? How much is it? You sure there's nothing wrong with it? It's in good condition? Yes, I'm anal about these things. As it turns out, apparently it's in pretty decent condition, and is a light pine colour and has wheels. WHEELS! My baby will have her own set of wheels before I do; that's both depressing and sad.

At any rate, it's wooden so I'm assuming pretty sturdy and she did say D would be able to rub it back and we can repaint it. I also need to get a new changing mat for it, something a bit softer than what's currently on it, and then just to decide what colour scheme I'm going to do. Even though our ultrasound showed we're having a girl, I can't let myself run out and buy all pink sheets and pink frillies, just in case we end up with a little boy.

So I'm pretty sure we're going to strip back the table and paint it white, and then I'll decide what to do with it from there. Right now her bedroom is really rather stark, and definitely needs some colour to it. I think I'll stick with neutrals for now, with a splash of light colour probably in the form of pinks and blues and greens and yellows. I don't know. I could very well be out shopping this weekend and come across a single bed sheet set that I have to have and the decision will then be completely out of my hands.

And speaking of shopping, we're heading out this weekend to do a spot of Christmas shopping. D's been dropping hints of all kinds of things he wouldn't mind owning for the past few weeks, and like a good wife-to-be, I've taken notice and written mental notes. Of course, given the state I'm in, I probably should have written them down on paper, but it's abit late for that now. I pretty well know what I'm going to buy him, and I think he's going to dig it.

Of course I'd tell you internet, but since he visits the site every so often, it would defeat the purpose of wrapping the gifts for him in the first place.

OH OH OH... D's residency came through yesterday. He went down to Immigration and they stamped his passport which now makes him a LEGAL alien for the next FOUR years!! But then he has to get his hotty ass out of the country by the 17th November 2009 or the feds will bust down our door and verbally, physically and sexually assault him until he screams "Uncle" and runs screaming to the airport. I'm joking of course. Aussie Feds aren't that brutal. They at least lube you up before they start ramming you. Which is more courtesy than I can say for Steve Irwin and all of his shennanigans with animals.

Anyway. Not sure what I'm going to be up to today; I started writing again last night so I may go back to that today and see what I can get done. Ideally I'd like to hook up my other 2 harddrives and pull everything off them so they can be formatted. Besides, I have years of journal writing on those drives, I'd like to have abit of a reread and eventually put those back up online - when I get my own domain of course.

My child seems to have shifted position again: she's now hovering around the right side of my belly, and the sensation is similar to that of something clawing right beneath my ribs in an effort to get around to my kidneys. Why she'd want to get around there I have no idea, but I think it may have something to do with the fact that my bladder is no longer the sole source of amusement that it once was.

My French Name Is...

2005-11-23T12:10:00.001+10:00

Your French name is Ciel which means 'sky'.

You are a day dreamer. You sit and stare at the clouds, wishing that you could be somewhere else. You love to imagine what life could be like if you were someone else, somewhere else. You are curious and sometimes inattentive.

What is your French name? via Quizilla

Yep, this is pretty well accurate.

Stolen from Chaos With Class.

Thoroughly Annoyed

2005-11-23T09:05:00.000+10:00

Why is it whenever I find a really neat site to shop from, I find out they don't ship to Australia? Silver Jewellery Club is the newest site I've found that only ships within the US. It's not fair! QVC doesn't ship internationally, Sephora doesn't ship internationally and half the shit at amazon doesn't ship internationally either! It's not fair AT ALL and yes I'm aware I sound like a whining child about it.

PS: The dog across the back hasn't stopped howling since 7am this morning. I'm going mental.

What is a Letter if Not the Beginning of a Name?

2005-11-23T06:55:00.000+10:00

I say this because I have just stumbled upon a blog whose writer has the SAME NAME as me. Wow. This has never happened to me before, so I got sheerly excited over it. Which brings me to my point, really: I know alot of you don't know my name. You only know it begins with an "e".

Some years ago, back when I had one (of like a thousand) domains, and my blog was MUCH better than this one in terms of content (because it was all angst ridden and I was writing about my relationship like it was constantly christmas and I was getting presents every day, but nowhere near as good as that) so therefore I had a lot of readers, I had decided to forgo using my real name incase certain people found my blog and reported it back to my ex. At that time, unbeknownst to me, he'd installed a nifty little program on my machine that tracked everything I did and everywhere I went, and well, basically everything. (He later got wise and put it on the server where I couldn't find it)

I am also intensely paranoid. I believe this also stems from my ex in part, because you tend to get that way after you've cheated on someone and don't want to be caught. Or, even before that point, when you think you're falling in love with someone else, even though that other person might be married with a family on the way... Or even in another state. But I digress.

So I stopped using my real name years and years ago, and chose to use a myriad of pseudonyms instead; changing them as often as I changed my layouts (which was damn near once a month). Eventually I got tired of that, and for awhile did not publish under any name at all. And then, after a few years of that, I thought bugger this, and began publishing under the first letter of my first name - "e". This suited me fine, and at the time, there weren't that many "e" people floating around the internet. At least, none that I knew of, and back then blogsurfing was as critical for me as breathing. In short, I read alot of blogs.

Some of you obviously know my name; some of you I talk to every single day, some of you I email weekly and some of you I haven't spoken to in years. Some of you I deeply love, even though we've never met but will someday.

At any rate, I know there are alot of you who have wanted to know what my name is for a little while now, so without further ado, I present to you swirlspice.

A Decision Has Been Made, I Think

2005-11-22T11:21:00.000+10:00

My whole pram/stroller debacle is of course what I'm referring to. After speaking with Mamala this morning, we've decided (for the sake of my own sanity) to wait until after the little parasite is born, and go shopping WITHOUT aids of any kind, and THEN decide what to do. I must admit this is a really good idea. If I can do the grocery shopping with my small bundle of ~~screams~~ joy in the trolley seat, laying down and peacefully ~~screaming~~ sleeping, then I won't need to worry over getting a stroller until she's around 3-4 months old. I like that plan.

I can't believe she's going to be here soon. Pretty soon it's going to be December and she'll BE HERE IN FEBRUARY. That's like.. 8 weeks. OH MY GOD. Right now, it's down to 11 and a half weeks. Soon it'll be eight. And then six. And then four. And then ohmygod I'm having contractions and have to finish my post now or I'll birth right here in the computer room. (I know, not pretty)

In other news, the MiL called the other day, and rattled off her neverending list of baby stuff she's planning on sending over. Of course, she's sending it all via ship because it's the cheapest way to go, and if she sends everything tomorrow, there's a 40% chance it'll arrive before the baby is born. If she waits much longer, then we won't get anything until way after the birth, and all her newborn gear will go to waste. It takes between 6-8 weeks to travel via cargo ship from the US at the best of times, so I don't know how long it's going to take coming from Canada, and that does not take into account how long customs will keep it at the docks for inspection. Probably at least a month - maybe more being that it's christmas-time and there's going to be a shit load of things waiting for check-in. I'm actually wondering if I'll get to see any of it before we leave for Canada in May for a month. I suppose only time will tell.

I did tell her not to bother sending over the second hand car seat she bought, because Australian standards and Canadian standards (while both commonwealth countries) are alot different, and legally I couldn't use the Canadian carseat over here. She agreed to keep it, and we'll use it when we go back to visit; after that she can toss it or sell it or do whatever she wants with it. I'm not sure what she's going to do with the crib she bought (after she was told we weren't using one) and I've since found out she also has a bassinet which she'd had for awhile, apparently, but it is on loan to one of her friends. (Not sure why she would have both bassinet AND a crib though - oh well) She also mentioned a bunch of other things she has for us, clothes and clothes and more clothes and did I mention clothes? Plus spoons and forks - which I believe are also used, so I'm not at all sure I'll be using them. D and I have become very prim about this whole thing, I fear. I don't really want to start my child out with used silverware. At any rate, there are some things she's sending that I'm looking forward to seeing; mostly I'm just hoping it'll all arrive before the baby does.

The Husband To End All Husbands

2005-11-21T14:02:00.000+10:00

Kevin Federline. No, seriously. I know you think he's just a piece of white trash who got lucky enough to marry the equally trashy Britster, but really, if you read this article, you'll just see what a great guy he really is. So articulate, so educated, so... well you'll just have to read it for yourself.

For real, yo.

It's One of Those Days

2005-11-21T13:50:00.000+10:00

I'm so bored today. It's hot out, and even though there's a bit of a breeze, it's not blowing in the windows, it's blowing around the house in general so the house is warmer than I'd like it to be.

In an attempt to alleviate the boredom, I played WoW for a few hours, and then decided that it's still a really boring game and I probably shouldn't have hooked up the second account again.

Now I'm not sure what to do. I'd love to go swimming - or at the very least, find a large body of water and sit in it - or just go out and about. D's at work, my brother is playing a game and I can't even ring Mamala cause she's out with Nanna. I'm even too bored to take a nap, even though I slept horribly last night.

Joke of the Day

2005-11-21T12:03:00.000+10:00

My brother sent me this joke, and I felt the need to share it.

What happened when Jesus went to Mount Olive?

Popeye kicked the shit out of him.

Oh, the Conundrums.

2005-11-19T07:46:00.000+10:00

Went out yesterday with Mamala and my brother, out baby furniture shopping. The first place we stopped in at was Babies Galore and I immediately spotted an entire row of bassinets. This pleased me more than you could imagine since on Thursday night, Mamala and I spent hours on the phone going through various baby websites in the hopes of finding somewhere to buy a non-expensive (read: less than $300) bassinet and we were coming up woefully short.

At any rate, all of their bassinets were on sale, from $170 down to $150 so naturally I bought one. A lovely white one that I can dress up with varying colours of lace, AND make up my own bed sheets because I'll be bloody buggered paying $35 or more! The baby industry must do VERY well over here in Australia; there certainly isn't any worthwhile competition out there to bring prices down.

But it's going to be wonderful making up these things instead of buying them. I've already decided she's going to sleep on satin sheets in the summer and a wool rug in her bassinet for the winter. Of course, that's only provided she doesn't grow so fast she ends up in her single bed before winter.

From there we headed down into Nerang to Pram City because I wanted to have a look at some strollers and prams, and since Babies Galore is outrageously expensive, there was no way in hell I was going to pay their prices. (Anything above $400 for a PRAM is way too exorbitant in my opinion) I did find a lovely pram that converts into a stroller for $270, made by Steelcraft which the saleslady practically talked me out of buying it because I'd really have much better luck and overall karmic happiness if I bought the $500 or even the $600 pram. Of course I bought neither, but did end up leaving the store empty handed.

Basically now I'm just in a conundrum and am faced with these perplexing questions: How often am I really going to use this thing? The baby won't be able to keep her neck up on her own until 3+ months along, so wouldn't it just be better to wait until that point and buy a cheaper stroller? How am I supposed to go grocery shopping and push both a trolley AND a pram at the same time? And when we start taking her out places, to parks and zoos and such, I will have a stroller by that time and won't really need the luxury of a pram, will I? You see how vexed I am.

It seems that's the only part of this whole "new mommy" thing I'm having trouble with. I've already decided she's not getting her HepB shot at birth, nor for the first year of life. She's not getting the menigicoccal or the pneumenococcal shots either since I'm not unconvinced that those types of "innoculations" don't cause something else anyway.

I know what bottles I'm using, even though I'll be breastfeeding until she's teething. I know what breast pump and sterilization unit I'll be buying. I know that I'm not going to be buying a baby monitor - the house echoes enough without adding to it; I will hear when she's crying or fussing. I know what to use for cradle cap, nappy rash and thrush.

So why is the prospect of getting a pram vs a stroller absolutely kicking my ass?

I Passed

2005-11-17T11:14:00.000+10:00

Called up my Dr. this morning and am happy to report I've passed my glucose test for gestational diabetes. Woot! This means I don't have it, and now won't have to do the 3hour test! Huzzah!!

A Little Bit of This... A Little Bit of That

2005-11-15T17:31:00.000+10:00

So I went in for my glucose test today. I ended up eating 2 pieces of toast with jam and had a cuppa tea before I went in, because it really wouldn't have done me very well to show up on an empty stomache and be expected to keep down 50g of ULTRA SWEET sugary drink.

Up until this point, I'd always been led to believe that I was going to be drinking raw glucose. Yes I know - YUCK. But that's what I'd always believed. Today, however, that myth was just that: a myth. It wasn't pure glucose (thank god!) but instead a highly, excessively sugary slightly carbonated soda drink. I'd been told sometimes it tastes like orange soda, sometimes coke... I had the great misfortune of getting lemonade flavoured gunk. 50g worth. Bigger than the mini-cans of soda, but smaller than the 375ml cans. I was rather intimidated by it - I probably should have saved the bottle, taken a photo and uploaded it for you to see. Blech.

Anyway. My Doctor had told me I would have 10 mins to drink it in, and then would have to sit in the pathology office for an hour before they took 3 vials of my blood. I was cool with that. Turns out, he was wrong. I had to drink that shit in FIVE minutes (and they timed me.. "You need to up the pace on that.") and about half an hour later, Mamala and I were informed we could go for a walk. When we expressed our confusion about that, the lady looked at us as though we were quite insane and informed us that if I was having the FULL test which takes THREE hours, then yes I'd have to sit there, but not for the small test I was having today.

So we walked across the street, I bought a skirt and a dress, and then wandered across to Vinnies and I bought a few more baby things. I never thought I'd be buying used and secondhand baby clothes, but when some of the things I find are BRAND NEW, there's just no way I can leave them behind. And for 50c, $1, $2... Why would I?

Anyway, so we went back to the pathology building afterward, I got my blood drawn and they made sure I wasn't dizzy or close to vomiting (apparently the soda type drink can make you do that...in which case they can't administer the test and you have to do it again), sucked out my blood and sent me merrily on my way.

We ended up heading up to the Pines Shopping Center in Elanora (QLD) and into PillowTalk where I picked up 6 bamboo place mats for my brand new dining table. It looks so awesome now; I totally LOVE buying stuff for my house.

And on Friday I go shopping for my baby! I'm terribly excited about that as I haven't done any yet really, and I figure since I only have 12 weeks to go before she's here, I really ought to get a move on and at least buy her a bed. Or a chest of drawers that can double as a bed.

Oh and PS: Looks like D has the week off. OI!

It's Getting the Best of Me

2005-11-14T07:43:00.000+10:00

I think it knows it too. I am, of course, referring to my pregnancy and all that I'm now enduring. I say enduring because while I love being pregnant, I don't love the forgetfulness so much. Or the swelling, and there's lots of that. Or the clumsiness - dear god the clumsiness!!

We're 27 weeks gestational this week, and I'm heading down to Mamala's today to stay overnight so we can head to the pathology unit tomorrow and do my glucose test. I didn't get it done the last time I thought I would because it turned out to be a little too early. So, tomorrow it is. I'm not dreading it AS much as I was, since learning that it's a sugary drink and not pure glucose (like I was lead to believe). So knowing that, I now know I can probably keep it down and not throw it up so I shouldn't be there for too much longer than an hour and a half. Evidently we drink the sugar and then wait an hour before a blood test is done. Hooray. I'm not allowed to walk around at all either because apparently that messes with the sugar digestion (or something) and can throw off the test. I don't want the test to be anything less than accurate.

And of course I believe I don't have gestational diabetes (but then to my own credit I thought for 5 months I was having a boy and it turns out I'm not) but you never do know, do you? Even though it would make sense to only get tested if you were showing symptoms of it... Anyway, so yes the test is finally tomorrow and I don't know when I'll end up getting the results back on that.

Also tomorrow the pest control people come in! FINALLY! I'm going insane with all the moths in the house. I honestly don't have a freaking clue where they're coming from, only that they seem to migrate into the pantry (somehow, the door is always shut) and stay there. We don't have any open bags of flour either, or rice so they're not nesting (do moths even nest?) in there. And any foodstuffs that are open, are sealed up nicely so they still can't get into it. I'm running out of thoughts about how these filthy creatures keep getting in my pantry.

Today our new lounge suite arrives! Huzzah!! Our nice long 3 seater and matching 2 single seaters. Too exciting.

In other exciting news, D applied for residency through his work last week and that the process takes about 2 weeks? I was wrong, sadly. It takes LESS than 2 weeks. In fact, it only took ONE week. While I am over the moon completely that he's gotten residency (we're just now waiting for the Visas to arrive) for 4 years, I'm a little annoyed that it came so soon because we were really hoping he'd have a week off from work. Believe me, he needs it. I keep telling him he should blog about his workplace, but so far he hasn't had the inclination. Anyway so my point here is they told him to go to work today, assuming that the Visa would be there. If it isn't, they'll send him home. I'm half hoping they'll send him home today; his contract expired last Friday and since he's only allowed to work at one establishment for 3 months ONLY (on his travelling work visa) then it's now illegal for him to keep working at the same place today, unless his permenant residency visa arrives. Fingers crossed that it comes this week, but not today so he can come home.

Wow I feel like there's so much to write about, even though I only have a few things left to say before I sign off and go have a shower and prepare to head out today.

My little parasite has been moving around ALOT the last few days. She actually got right under my left hip bone the other day and started tickling me somehow - my eyes bulged out wide and freaky-like as I realized what she was doing, and during a quick conversation with Garth (who was sitting beside me at the time) telling him what she was doing, I poked her rapidly a couple of times and she moved. Thank christ, is all I can say. It's bad enough to have some asshat tickle you mercilessly on the OUTSIDE and won't stop; it's something completely different to get tickled from the INSIDE and not know HOW to stop it. Or if you even can. I hope she doesn't try that again any time soon.

I can't believe we're going to be at 30 weeks gestational in just 3 weeks. Time has flown by SO quickly, it's really rather unbelievable. I was saying to Mamala the other day how much I'm loving being pregnant, but that I'm going to miss it big time too. Right now my little parasite is exclusively mine. If I don't want to be touched, nobody will touch me and therefore nobody can touch her. If I want to be selfish and not let anyone feel her kicking, I can be. But in just 12 short weeks once she's here, I will have no more of that kind of control. I don't want to keep it, of course, because I want everyone to share in her love and presence, but it was just interesting to note that while she exclusively mine right now, she won't be for much longer.

I guess that will be my first lesson in letting go.

To Say I'm A Domestic Goddess Might Be A Tad Far-Fetched

2005-11-12T07:39:00.000+10:00

Though I'm really, really trying. When we moved into the house, I was so excited and so happy because not only do I get my own living space again, but now I can start doing wifey, and more importantly, MOMMY type things. Like cooking. Cooking is essential for every day living.

When I was with my ex, he cooked most of the time simply because he was better at it than me. And he probably still is. I've never known anyone who could cook so good. Of course back then I ate bugger all so I didn't truly appreciate it - not that way I appreciate food now, anyway. But, I digress.

I've always known how to cook. I just prefer not to, because I don't especially like to, and I've never made that a secret. My ex knew it before I moved in with him, and my current knows it as well. But, because things are rapidly changing in our household, I decided to get with the times and start cooking dinners.

You've no idea how excited I was to do this. My first time making an actual meal for my beloved, and I wanted it to turn out right. I didn't want any hassles, any problems; in short, I didn't want anything to go wrong and I EXPECTED everything to go right. I was wrong.

It turns out that having a fan-forced oven dramatically changes the way you cook. In the beginning, I thought this was neat because it's supposed to cut your cooking time down and supposed to cook everything better over all. I will heartily disagree with this. I've never in my LIFE had to deal with such a shit piece of equipment before! I absolutely HATE it. Nothing comes out right. The chicken is always overdone because even though the instructions say to bake at 180 for 35mins, the chicken IS NOT COOKED. So I throw it back for another half an hour, and by the time it's ready, it's dry and tasting thoroughly like cardboard. ALL THE FREAKING TIME.

Steak and porkchops are the same. I go by the instructions and they ALL come out dry and tasteless. And in the beginning I was wondering if it was me, if I just really didn't know how to cook anything. But then my brother, who is a fairly good cook in his own right, started using the oven and even HE found it difficult. So I don't take it so personally anymore; I know the oven isn't discriminating against ME per se, it just hates everybody equally. Meanwhile, I have to figure out a way to cook all my meats so they're COOKED properly, all while maintaining their flavour and juiciness.

I guess I won't hold my breath though.

WordPress

2005-11-11T09:11:00.000+10:00

Thanks to the Complimenting Complimenter I now have a wordpress account. Yay! The only bad thing about it, is that in order for me to make my own templates or edit the existing ones, I need to have the application installed somewhere first. Doh. It's not as easy as blogger, what with the editing of templates right in the dashboard. It's a little bit inconvenient, actually, because now this means I am going to have to go get an account someplace so I can ftp in.

Unless, of course, I'm doing it wrong and I don't need an account someplace afterall. Apparently I do need to install it somewhere though, if I want to make any changes and edits. Hmm...

//edit 12:08pm: Okay, so I figured out that yes I need somewhere to upload all these wonderful files. From what I can understand, it's similar to Moveable Type but with some noteable differences. Also from what I understand, I'm going to have to register a domain in order to upload all my files, since my darling D's host isn't supporting PHP on his plan. Now I have to figure out a domain to register.

Sigh.

We Don't Have to Sit on the Floor Anymore!

2005-11-10T08:44:00.000+10:00

Because now we have furniture!!! I've uploaded new pictures into FlickR, but you can just go quickly here instead and see them. We so love our new stuff, and now that our place is getting more to be looking like an abode rather than a shell that simply protects us from the rain, we've all decided we really feel rather rich right now. ;)

In other news, D ran his 5km marathon last night... Well, almost! He walked 1.5km but ran the rest of the distance. I'm SO proud of him, it's such an achievement. God knows even not being pregnant there is no way I could do something like that. And the amazing thing, he'd only been preparing for it for a week! But, he was aching last night; thighs, calves, ass, feet... Even his arms and shoulders were stiff. I gave him a nice massage after he got out of the shower, and he started feeling a little bit better. I'm not sure how he's doing today, since he left for work before I had a chance to really wake up and talk to him.

Mamala and Nanna headed up to Bundaberg yesterday morning and arrived in the early afternoon to visit with my Aunt and Uncle (Mamala's brother and sister in law). My Uncle is quite multi-talented: builder, boater and now pilot. His plane (that HE BUILT!!) goes up for it's inaugral flight today around 1pm which is what they wanted to see. I think eventually my Uncle is going to go for his commercial pilot license, but I'm not sure how far in the future that's going to be.

Baby was kicking around ALOT yesterday, so I'm wondering if she's going to do the same today. My belly was jumping all over the place as she moved and poked and punched and kicked. It was so incredible though, I can't even describe it. And as we were laying on the NEW COUCH last night watching House MD, D had his hand on my stomache and every so often would feel her move and ask, "Was that her?" "Her again?" My responses to him was, "She's talking back to you, hon." Of course that brought a HUGE grin to his face. He's going to be such a great daddy, and god knows our child is going to totally be Daddy's Little Princess. Maybe I should register that and set up a blog on it in prep for her 16th birthday.

More Good News

2005-11-09T07:46:00.000+10:00

As if yesterday's news wasn't enough, there's more that I forgot to tell you about as well! I know I haven't mentioned our smallish infestation we've been having, mainly because it's just too gross to think about, but since that's soon to be done with, I will now mention it.

We have larvae things that look like maggots which climb their way up our pantry walls and slide into the corners of the ceiling and cocoon themselves. I think these things are moth larvae, but I honestly don't know for sure. We've been killing them as fast as we see them but we have absolutely no idea how to stop them coming back. Thankfully they're not climbing into the food in the pantry.

I got in touch with our realtor's assistant (who is absolutely amazing) yesterday about that; originally she had called me to find out about the phone bill (we get reimbursed for the line connection fee etc) and so I told her then about our problem. Within a few hours, she'd contacted the owner of the house and gotten approval for pest control to come in and do a full spray. Pest control called yesterday saying they'd be out on Tuesday around noon and we have to leave the house for 2 hours.

I'm all for this, obviously, except for one minor detail: Will this spray kill our gecko? I don't want him to die.

So now I have to call the pest control people today and find out about that, and to also find out if I have to cover all my furniture and what I should do about all the food in the pantry. I've never had my house sprayed before, both inside and out, so this is a whole new thing for me. But I'm excited!

Now if only the owner of the place would put in reverse cycle airconditioning and a normal, freestanding clothesline.

I Am Getting Furniture

2005-11-08T17:50:00.000+10:00

Truly, I am. For those of you unaware of my entire furniture horror saga, a quick recap will be in order. For those of you aware of it, you can reread or skip down abit.

[Begin Recap...]
We went into the furniture store on October 1st and bought a beautiful lounge and dining suite. (Domayne for those of you in Australia) We were told we'd have the furniture in 4 weeks, which we were shocked at, but agreed to - after all, we did get financing through them and you can't really be that picky. So 4 weeks comes and goes, and I call them up and ask what the hell is going on with our furniture, and when can we expect it? I'm informed that the dining table has already arrived and for an additional $75 delivery fee, we can have the furniture delivered separately - the couch was due to go into transport from Sydney on the 1st November and would take approximately 2 weeks to arrive, depending on the carrier. (Because you all know how SLOW and STEADY truckers drive)

I'm not happy with this of course, but there isn't too much I can do, so I hang up. Yesterday I called back to see what the hell was going on, because nobody had called to let us know anything, and if the couch (by some miracle) had indeed arrived, then I would like to know when it was going to be delivered. The girl on the phone tells me it should have gone into transport on the 1st according to her computer, and arrive this week, but now she's going to have to track it down and call me back. Ok good, maybe we'll get to the bottom of this now. She calls me back, and lo and behold... it's going to take ANOTHER 2 weeks because the couch isn't even FINISHED yet!!!!!!!! It's still in the freaking warehouse in Sydney, waiting for the fabric to arrive (and arrive from where, I have NO idea). So now, our entire furniture set which was supposed to have only taken ONE month to arrive, will now take approximately TWO months. We're looking at around December for it to get here.

So, obviously that's not good enough, right? I mean, wouldn't YOU be pissed off if you're living in a house with no furniture since late September? So, my brother and I hash it out last night and decide we're going to cancel the order as long as it's okay with D, and we're going to go in and do it today. D says yes, cancel the order, we're not buying through them EVER again; they've dicked us around enough.
[End Recap...]

Okay! So, now, today we go in to the store and immediately request to speak with the franchise manager, Pete. Pete's a nice guy, and wonders how he can help us, and why. We give him the rundown, including about our sales guy and how unhappy we were with everything we've been put through, and that we're now in store to cancel the order.

He asks us if there's anything he can do to save the order from being cancelled. I told him no, that we're pretty well tired of dealing with people from your store. He nodded in sympathy and continued looking through our account trying in vain to get us to reconsider.

And then he said the magic words. Okay so I don't remember exactly what they were but the word "discount" was mentioned alot. Then he asked if he could show us some floor models of lounge suites that were available for purchase.

In short, we stayed with Domayne, got an upgraded lounge suite that would have ordinarily brought our order total up to $6.5k and we got it for $4.7k - not a bad deal at all! And, not only is that good... Since the lounge we want is a brand new model and was only released a few days ago, the stock has to come from Brisbane because they don't have any at the store, so in the interim while we're waiting for the new suite to come in, they're LENDING us the floor model 3 seater until Monday when the actual new suite arrives. So that's coming today, along with our dining suite.

Honestly, it's amazing what can happen when you talk to the franchise manager of a store!

Feeling Jipped

2005-11-05T09:55:00.000+10:00

I had two false negative pregnancy tests so I was in denial for the first two months. I didn't get to take a photo of the test with the little markings that scream, "Yes, you're pregnant!!"

I didn't get to have a recording of any of my ultrasounds, because people are worried they'll get sued if an abnormality shows up, and they didn't catch it. (Somehow stills don't show that?!)

I have no 4-D scans of my baby. Other people get them. Other people get full DVDs of their baby moving and turning and stretching and sucking her/his thumb. Not me though. I wonder if that's just an Australian thing, or because I'm using the public health system.

Either way it sucks and I feel jipped.

Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction

2005-11-05T08:10:00.000+10:00

I think I may have a mild case of this. For those of you who don't know, this can sometimes happen during pregnancy. Basically all this means is that the ligaments surrounding the pubic bone and the bones on either side of the bottom of your spine drift apart - as is the case anyway since ligaments and things are all shifting around as your body changes. What makes this a little bit different than normal, is that it happens too early in the pregnancy, and is rather painful, particularly at night. If you're interested, you can read more about it at the link below:

• Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction.

I don't know for sure that I even have this, but judging from the pains I experience whenever I lay down, I'm going to go with the fact that I probably am, albeit mildly.

The most common is pain and difficulty when walking. Some women describe the feeling of their pelvis coming apart. The pain is made worse when turning in bed or doing something that involves standing on one leg, such as climbing up stairs, getting dressed and getting in and out of a car.

The pain is generally felt in the pubis and/or the sacro-iliac joints, but can also be experienced in the groin, the inner side of the thighs, the hips and in one or both buttocks.

I'll admit that it sometimes hurts to get dressed standing up, especially when I have to lean forward to pull on a skirt or shorts or something. It hurts more when I'm getting out of the car, and hurts even MORE when I'm sleeping and have to roll over in the middle of the night. They say putting a pillow between your thighs helps alleviate this and other back pains, but I can't attest to that. In fact, in my case, it hasn't helped at all.

I can barely even explain the pain that I feel anyway. It doesn't shoot down the front of my thighs, the pain usually stays localized and feels like it's within the actual pelvic bone (the one that runs between your thighs, I have no idea what that's called) itself. It makes it very difficult to turn from side to side while sleeping, or even getting out of bed to go to the bathroom. Of course, when I do manage to wake up to go to the loo, I can barely walk anyway because the pain is so great. And SOMETIMES I'll get pain in my lower left hip bone, at the back. This was first thought to be sciatica, but after reading through the SPD information, I no longer believe that to be the case.

I have my Dr. appointment on Monday and I'm going to ask him if this is what I have so at least I know, though apparently nothing can be done about it during pregnancy so it's just something I'll have to live with. (Along with the numb hips and thighs, and the numb arms on ocassion...)

I slept badly last night though surprisingly I wasn't in any pain from the SPD, but I did have a back ache that has continued into my waking hours. I think it was because I fell asleep on our makeshift couch last night, which is nothing more than a single spring bed with four blankets ontop that serve as a mattress. It's very bouncy and sags deep in the middle but is surprisingly comfortable; my back now seems to be disagreeing with that.

Not sure what we're doing today, only that it's Saturday and seems to be rather nice out and I do know we're going to be leaving the house, I'm just not sure where we're going. We've been looking at upgrading my computer system for a few months now, so MAYBE we might go and do that... Not that we really have an extra $900 to spend, and I'd rather get the baby some furniture for that, or me some more clothes because god knows I'm fast running out of them! But on the other hand... I REALLY want a new system. I really really do.